Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Wondering about a DNA test and Custody

Well my daughter will be here in about 6 weeks and Were not sure if my bf is the father or this other guy. Well My bf doesn't care what the test comes out to be he says he has been here the whole pregnancy and that that's his little girl no matter what. This other guy didn't want anything to do with her until today he told me that he is gonna take me to court and get full custody of her if she is his?? Now he has a record of kidnapping and assault that i didn't know about but could he get custody of her i dont want him around her for her safety he doesn't work and is always in prison. He says his gf will be her new mommy, which i dont think so. But im just wondering can he do that? Is there anything I can do to prevent this before she is born or No. The only thing he has on me about not being stable is i am not working but thats because I am on bed rest due to pre laborand was told i have to be on bed rest till she is born.

Answer Question

Asked by Mommytobe403 at 2:58 PM on Mar. 12, 2009 in Pregnancy

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • in most cases the mom gets the baby and if he hasnt been there tell now he should leave you alone i hope its your bfs shouldnt be worried if his has a past history of jail then he wont get her my dad didnt get me when i was 5 becuz of his record

    Answer by Lacrisha at 3:02 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • No, there isn't a chance in the world that a judge would allow him to have full custody. If a DNA test confirmed that he was the father, he would probably be allowed visitation. Every state is different on these types of things so it's hard to say. My brother in law went through this with his now ex-wife. She was sleeping with another man and found out she was pregnant. He signed the birth certificate but it's quite obvious the child is the other man's baby. But he signed all the papers without a DNA test so the other guy is just SOL according to the judge unless my brother in law wants to go along with it. So I think you really need to talk to a lawyer about this. You are going to need some legal help!

    Answer by DDry at 3:05 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • do not worry your self what so ever no court in there right mind would give him custody of your baby if he is proven too be the father with his record how ever they could push for visitation and all you have too do is state you want them supervised threw the courts where he has a record of kidnapping on him as for the thing on you not working as long as you can prove you have a place too live court do not care and if your boyfriend is willing too help you that is a plus also my ex tried too do the same with my oldest and they just laughed at him

    Answer by greeniemommy at 3:06 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • Well, even if your bf signs the birth certificate (the other guy can't sign it without you saying yes) the other guy can take you to court and get an order for a Paternity test, but he will need to pay for it, it will be of no expense to you. And even if he is the biological father, there is hardly a chance with his record that he will get full custody of the child. At best he would be allowed visitations, and with his record you can request that they be supervised visits only.

    Answer by CarolynBarnett at 3:06 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • i would not worry about it. first off you are not married to this guy so he is not going to sign the birth certificate. so if he wants to take you to court first he has to come up with the money for a dna test and they are not cheap. then if he is the father then he has to take you to court and hire a lawyer. also not cheap. if he does witch he get threw all this then he has to prove that you are unfit and not working during pregnancy is not considered unfit. so if he wants to be a bastard then let him be. just don't talk to him and don't stress yourself about him. you need to be concerned about your baby.


    Answer by twinsnseptember at 3:06 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • You shouldn't have not problem, When she is born give her the other guy last name or yours. He will have to take you to court and proof he is the father and that will cost him a lot of money. Just keep telling him he is not the father. STOP TALKING TO HIM!! he sounds very dangerous.
    I just hope for the baby's sake that the second guy is a good man? AGAIN....

    Answer by gammie at 3:22 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • I see a trip to the Maury show in your future........
    yeah, he can request and get DNA testing and possibly be granted some sort of joint legal custody and shared physical custody (visitation) It all depends on the whole story, and honestly we only get one side here on Cafe Mom, and it isn't a baby daddy friendly place much of the time. GL

    Answer by PROGENITOR at 3:39 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • And it isn't right to give the responsiblity to a man that might not be her father. This could have very negative consequences for him in the future if things don't work out between you two (sorry but if he might not be the father of your baby doesn't sound like the relationship is all that in the clear for a happy future), he could be stuck paying for a kid that isn't his. I wouldn't let him do anything until he knows it is his or you guys marry and he adopts. If you loved him you wouldn't let him place himself in a precarious situation.

    Answer by PROGENITOR at 3:41 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • The other guy is just trying to scare you. Don't let him, he can't do shit.

    Answer by katskelington at 4:52 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • You don't know when ur last period was or what day u had sex with this other guy??? I'd think about that before getting a DNA test.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:34 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.