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I Want To Adopt A friend's Child

My friend has 2 boys and she is pregnant with her 3rd child she wants to give the baby up for adoption it's a girl. she does not think she can raise another child. the baby's father agrees and is willing to have me adopt there baby, I am asking what do i need to do? they do not want any money out of this adpotion?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 4:28 PM on Mar. 12, 2009 in Adoption

Answers (19)
  • call a lawyer. You guys will need to fill out papers and know your rights

    Answer by heather.darin at 4:30 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • I'd also call a lawyer. Make sure there's nothing in there where they can take the baby back if they decide to later. It might be in the back of their heads that they can change their minds later.

    Answer by ReneeK3 at 4:33 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • Wow that wouldnt be easy for me. They will always see themselves as mom and dad and it would be hard not to cross that line. I commend you for doing this. I hope everything works out for you all. If more people could do this we might have closer knit communities.

    Answer by MamaChamp at 4:36 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • Contact a lawyer.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:46 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • If you are truly this womans friend encourage her to keep her baby. Maybe you can offer to help out. Being a birth mother is a world of hurt.

    Answer by onethentwins at 5:41 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • I think you need to decide if you want to be her friend OR parent her child. Because it's unlikely that your friendship would survive such an emotionally charged situation intact.

    Answer by grtlyblesd at 7:32 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • THey better not want any money. That's illegal you know.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:26 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • If you are all in agreement on you adopting this child, then start with a lawyer to specializes in adoptions. You will probably need a homestudy. My very very best friend in the entire world is a birthmother who allowed a friend to adopt her baby and she is absolutely fine with it. She'll be the first to tell anyone that boy is not her son, it's the adoptive mother's son and she made the right decision. He is 10 years old now and my friend and her friend have a wonderful relationship. My friend is a mom here on Cafemom - if you want to talk with her about how she did it and how she feels about it, pm me. I know she'll be more than willing to talk to you about it.

    Answer by MommyAddie at 8:17 AM on Mar. 13, 2009

  • All three of you need to go speak with an attorney together. Don't go through an agency. You'll need a homestudy and background check.

    Answer by matthewscandi at 8:44 AM on Mar. 13, 2009

  • as a previous mom mentioned you need to decide if you want to be your friends friend or her babys mom. How difficult will it be when teh baby is old enough to ask questions? If money is an issue the foster care system is loaded with children who come from serious backgrounds who are desperate for a forever home. I would encourage your friend to keep her baby at least for awhile and try it and if it truly doesnt work then put it up for adoption but if I were you I would not adopt her baby

    Answer by humaniterian87 at 10:24 PM on Mar. 13, 2009

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