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why is it that people judge young moms so much?

I am 21 and have 2 kids. I love kids. i always get judged because i am so young. my family thinks that it is irresposible of me to want more kids. that i should have enjoyed my life more before i had kids. I dont get it. if i am a good mom and this is what i wanted shouldnt people just understand. We are also ttc baby number 3. i am getting critisized all the time by the in laws and my own family for this. shouldnt it be our choice and shouldnt they support us more?


Asked by Alina456 at 8:05 PM on Mar. 12, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 3 (14 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • Okay, so why do young mothers get judged. Because one rotten apple ruins the bunch. A large percentage of young mothers drop their children off with the grandparents and let them take over, which is also the grandparents fault for letting this happen. But there are good young mothers out there, and if you are one of them that’s great. When your children are old enough to be out of your home you will still be young enough to be able to have fun. I was 17 when I got married and 20 when I had our first child. The only regret was when I was 25 and had 2 kids my DH was out of work. I had to go back to school, find a babysitter, study, housework, kids homework, and I worked at the time. So it would have been easier to go to school before I became a mother, but it took becoming a mother before I realized I needed to be able to take care of my babies.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:27 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • you know i was thinking the same thing.... im 19 and i just had my son and im very happily married....but no one seems to care about that... when ever i go out with friends(older ones) people always ask them how old the baby is... they never look at me...his mom... it really bugs me...

    Answer by kasiface at 8:09 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • Not this again.............

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:09 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • gosh at that age i was having too much fun, growing up, shopping with my girlies, stuff liek that, i'm so glad i waited for kids, i had time for myself!!!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:11 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • People judge no matter what. They should be more supportive, but that doesn't mean they are going to understand that. Be proud of who you are and for your family.

    BTW I get judged a lot about my parenting and all of the other issues that come along with it all of the time by my ILs. It does annoy me but actually just realize how glad I am that I don't make the choices they think I should make. I make better ones. Children are amazing, you have the right to have more if you want! :)

    Answer by hannahwill at 8:13 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • Why is this question asked a minimum of 4 times per day?

    I don't know.

    Because people can judge, so they always will.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:15 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • Probably because you don't have an education.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:17 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • Does anybody check to see if this got asked yet? hmmmmm

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:19 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • Okay, once again Hon.. you are not the first and you won't be the last. Please quit thinking that everyone is judging you because they probably ARE! When you come on cafemom seeking consoling... it just ain't going to happen. You see, we don't care what age you are.. as long as you can care for your child. Remember Hon.. women can have babies when they are 12, so what makes you so special... so you've reached puberty and are now a woman.. big deal. You probably have one of those "Baby On Board" signs in your car too... don't ya.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:21 PM on Mar. 12, 2009

  • good thing i got to enjoy my teens, yeah... it was soooooooooo much fun not worrying about babies

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:22 PM on Mar. 12, 2009