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How do you deal with race education of your children?

My SO, my 2 year old and myself are white people. We also have a son that is 1/2 black..the product of an affair I had while my SO and I were seperated. We are all together again and raising him. So how do others with mixed children deal with race/identity education? His Biological father isn't really an option.

 
missv66

Asked by missv66 at 10:32 AM on Mar. 13, 2009 in General Parenting

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Answers (9)
  • They do see color...prejudice is taught...but they see color. We are black and my son has always attended very diverse schools....predominantly white. When he was in preschool, around 4, he asked his friend why he wasn't brown like him. In a very innocent way...the teacher got a kick out of the innocence of the question. He's now 6 and tells me that we have to treat everyone the same and it doesn't matter if they have different skin colors...they must have taught him that in school because I didn't. My point is to just embrace your baby for who he is...teach him that his color on the outside doesn't mean as much as what he has on the inside. He'll be fine.
    NJMom2Tyler

    Answer by NJMom2Tyler at 1:40 PM on Mar. 13, 2009

  • Kids don't see color unless you teach them too.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:37 AM on Mar. 13, 2009

  • I am white and my hubby is black/mexican...our daughter has my skin complexion (very light skinned)....she is 2 1/2 the question really hasn't come up yet...(why she looks like me and daddy doesn't look like us) but when we are playing chutes & ladders she always gives her daddy the dark-skinned little boy..lol....when her dad tries to use another character she says "no daddy this one looks like you.." just like she gives me the blonde haired one and she gives herself the dark- haired one...anyway i was getting off topic....i'm not really sure how to educate my daughter on race...when and if she asks why there are different people with different skin colors i will tell her that what i think is appropiate..i mean the reason that people have different skin colors has a lot to do with the originate from...people who live in hotter climates had to produce more melanin in their skin to protect it from the sun...

    ThinkPink23

    Answer by ThinkPink23 at 10:42 AM on Mar. 13, 2009

  • i think that children DO see color but don't "SEE" it the way some may see it...as a negative connotation(sp)
    ThinkPink23

    Answer by ThinkPink23 at 10:45 AM on Mar. 13, 2009

  • My son is hispanic and both my husband and i are white. I feel it is important to say that his biological father is not in the picture, and I would like it to stay that way for a very very long time. My husband is called daddy, and he introuces michael as our boy. I've heard some people say some very hurtful things. My husband picked up Michael one day and was telling him i love you over and over again and giving him lots of hugs and kisses, just being very silly. I overheard someone say "That poor guy, I wonder if he knows that's not his kid." I was heated!
    Crystal1124

    Answer by Crystal1124 at 10:47 AM on Mar. 13, 2009

  • Crystal that is So Freaking RUDE! Some people!!
    I'm sorry you had to overhear that.
    I honestly tell my children that God makes everyone and we are all God's children, he makes us all different b/c he wants us to be special.
    It hasn't really come up in my family idk why. We are very mixed up so maybe they are just used to seeing different people. I'm white, my dh is mexican, my SIL is Asian. People always stare @ us when we go out together. Not sure if it b/c we have 7 kids or all the races and they are trying to figure out who goes w/ who.
    4monkees

    Answer by 4monkees at 11:58 AM on Mar. 13, 2009

  • I don't do anything, really. I teach my children to embrace all sides of themselves. I also tell them to explore other cultures, too. I'm mixed with everything, and my DF is Italian. My DD1's dad is Hawaiian and Portuguese (he lives in Hawaii, he's a deadbeat, and only sees her during the summer) and DD2's dad is my DF.
    ThaMCE

    Answer by ThaMCE at 12:07 PM on Mar. 13, 2009

  • I think they see color but in their own way. When my DD was 3 all she wanted for Christmas was a "chocolate" doll. She would see a comercial for babies and they would show dolls of different hair color and skin color. I think she really thought the doll was made of chocolate. We got it for her and she loved that doll to death! It was a beautiful doll. I just got it for her and never said a word. My children do not live in an all white world so it is fine with me if they take an interest in other skin colors and ethnicity's. There are good and bad in all races, you are who your friends are so as long as they are good people they will draw good people to them no matter what color. There are great things to be learned from each culture, food, music etc.
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 12:21 PM on Mar. 13, 2009

  • Children behave the way they are taught. We have to teach from an early age the EVERYONE is different and it is ok to be different from someone else. Children need to be taught that there is good and bad in every culture and to treat everyone equally and without regard for their skin color or race, religion, etc. That is the only way for people to get along.

    As to race specific, is there anyone you know of that race? They could help you out. There may be books that you can read and help explain things to your child. Look for cultural events in your area.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 2:30 PM on Mar. 13, 2009

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