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How can I adapt to terrible two's

My 23 month old is a real handful. Anytime we go anywhere she wants to run around and if we don't let her she throws a temper tantrum. We are to the point we don't want to take her anywhere. I am not one of those mom's who like to repremand their children in public but I know if we stop taking her places that isn't teaching her anything. Any suggestions?

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mcmom0307

Asked by mcmom0307 at 5:54 PM on Mar. 13, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

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Answers (9)
  • You don't like to discipline her in public. Are you one of those counting moms? Seriously... swat her butt.. she will learn real fast.. You are the parent, you are in control.. you are not teaching her anything if you stay home. You are punishing yourself. Good luck with that.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:57 PM on Mar. 13, 2009

  • Seems like your choices are let her do what she wants or discpline even when you don't like to. It may be uncomftorble to discipline in public, but it is nessesary. What you are doing is teaching her soemthing... just nothing postitive. Its teaching her that she has control and can do what she wants when in public and that if she throws a temper tantrum she will get what she wants. Your teaching her that it is okay for her to manipulate you and your husband. And that will grow into a much bigger behavior problem if you do not decide to change it. I am with Anon5;57, swat her butt and set her in the cart and tell her "NO". She will get it quickly. Discipline requires consitantcy, dispite the location.
    daughteroftruth

    Answer by daughteroftruth at 6:16 PM on Mar. 13, 2009

  • Never put your hands on a child ever. thats horrible. my son has acted out in alot of bad ways but hitting them isnt showing them that they are loved.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:36 PM on Mar. 13, 2009

  • Discipline! I've actually had strangers THANK ME for being willing to discipline my child in public. Too many moms are embarassed by it and it shows in how the child behaves. Your daughter is pushing your buttons. She knows that you won't do anything about her behavior in public. You can keep letting her make the rules or you can teach her that good behavior is required everywhere.
    First, put her in the shopping cart. She is too young to run around while you shop. She will break things, get into things, get away from you, and you will not be able to do the shopping you need to do. Strap her into the seat, no choice.
    Second, put an old baby blanket in your bag. If she throws a fit, put it on the floor and plop her one it. Right in the middle of the aisle. Let her throw her fit, let her serve her time-out time. Taking her home only teaches her that throwing a fit gets her back to her toys quicker.
    kaycee14

    Answer by kaycee14 at 6:49 PM on Mar. 13, 2009

  • There is no such thing as terrible twos. It's all about disipline. if your children are parented properly, they should be more than able to be obedient and well behaved by the age of 2. "Terrible twos" is just a way of blaming children for the parent's lack of responsibility to disipline their children. You are the parent, if you can't control a 2 year old now, God help you when they get older.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:45 PM on Mar. 13, 2009

  • First of all, pay no attention to the negativity from a few of the anons replying to your question.
    Second, timing is everything when it comes to errands and toddlers. Mornings are best and the fewer stops the better. (It also helps to have a drink/snack on hand to help distract.) Make sure she has a chance to play/run around before you go and after the errand.
    Third, if you can, involve her in the errand: ask her to point things out, look for colors etc.
    Fourth: put her in a cart or stroller. Let her walk from the car to the store then get a cart.
    Fifth: tell her right before you're going where you're going and that you expect her to have her listening ears on. Let's face it, she's only two.
    Finally, chose your destinations wisely. I wouldn't advise taking her to say shop for clothes for you because she's not going to have the attention span/patience but the supermarket or something quick should be fine.
    twinclubmom

    Answer by twinclubmom at 8:23 PM on Mar. 13, 2009

  • Cont'd. Now if you're talking about going someplace as a family on a weekend or something: again timing is everything but also be sure to build in a time and place where she can have the freedom to walk/run around with you. Hang in there. You'll get through it!
    twinclubmom

    Answer by twinclubmom at 8:26 PM on Mar. 13, 2009

  • i see two option. one, you learn to discipline in public. yes its embarrasing, but at least they people are watching you in control of your child, not the other way around. or two. while it may not be as affective, really depends on the child, dont let her go out. she's got alot of energy to get out, as all toddlers do. it will give you a break and there wont be any issues in public. you know how your daugher responds, and what she responds best to. go with that. will she feel worse by being left out? or by being punished in public? of course we dont like to make our kids feel worse about things, but whatever works best for YOUR child is what you should do.
    m4m4

    Answer by m4m4 at 8:56 PM on Mar. 13, 2009

  • We are in that stage too. I get embarrased when he misbehaves in public but I don't want to not do anything b/c I don't want to be that parent that lets their kid do whatever in public. He's in that stage where he wants to test our limits and when we are at home we can do time out or whatever but that's not so easy in public. We will talk to him and tell him that's not ok, obviously that doesn't always work. We take him to the bathroom if were out somewhere and that usually lets him know he's in trouble. I have had to spank him before if the bathroom talk didn't work. Also, I take his tv out of the car as punishment, that usually gets him. I just don't want to threaten to take him home everytime he misbehaves b/c then if he's ready to go home he will just throw a temper tantrum.
    Mommy0425

    Answer by Mommy0425 at 9:44 PM on Mar. 13, 2009

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