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How much did your husband help with a new baby?

I don't know if I'm expecting too much of him or if he's just being a rick-pay. I just gave birth to a beautiful little girl 3 weeks ago. my back and groin is still killing me, and I haven't got any sleep and hardly any help from anyone, even though I've asked. I feel drained, and my husband gets upset when the house isn't spotless, even though I'm taking care of his 3 and 7 year old (my stepchildren) on top of the new baby. am I asking too much of him to lay off me until I heal a little better? Did anyone get any help from their husbands?

 
not-so-des-hw

Asked by not-so-des-hw at 12:53 AM on Mar. 15, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (12)
  • I moved in with my boyfriend when my son (who isnt his) was 3 months old. Ever since that first night, I didnt have to get up at night. Now 2 years later, He is still the one who changes most of the diapers, and he ALWAYS wothout FAIL gets up at night with our son and daughter if they wake up. he spoils me, lol!
    HelloKitty86

    Answer by HelloKitty86 at 1:23 AM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • Are you kidding me? Tell him to get off his ass! You're his wife, not his paid housekeeper/nanny!!!
    Rozzanne

    Answer by Rozzanne at 12:59 AM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • My husband help out a lot. He took three weeks off work so that we would both spend time with the baby and keep the house clean together. Hell right now he is putting Ronin back to sleep because it is his turn (it is my turn 90% of the time, but sometimes I declare it is his turn lol)
    Amelora

    Answer by Amelora at 1:09 AM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • lmao I did it all. He freaked out when I tried taking a shower and the baby would cry. So I had to just bring my son in the bathroom with me. I never had a moment to myself!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:12 AM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • my husband help out the kids are just much his as your he need to halp out if he has a job see if he will give the baby last bottle befor bed that is what we did when are kids was that little now that they old they do more for them self it get better just ask nicely and say thank you if your mom or his mom live close call and ask if they can over to help or ask family or friends to help tell them how you fell
    michellesp

    Answer by michellesp at 2:14 AM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • My husband was always so good with our kids when they were babies. He loves babies! LOL! He loved getting them in the middle of the night when I would pump and he could give them bottles and rock them and kiss their heads and smell them. He loved holding them on his chest...he loved talking to them and playing with them. He's the one who cries when they grow up and when I had my hysterectomy he was the one that was sad we couldn't have anymore babies. He's still a great daddy, but he did love the baby stage the best and he was good at it...diapers, baths, feedings...all of it.
    mizkaye

    Answer by mizkaye at 3:38 AM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • First off I would hand hubby a mop and broom and let him clean to his own expectations. My son in laws help endlessly with their kids. My daughters work also out side the home as well as in and they pull together. I went through no help at all when raising my kids. It was terrible doing it all yourself. This generation of dads are truly hands on. It is great for the babies as well as the moms.
    nana2u10

    Answer by nana2u10 at 4:37 AM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • I agree with the first poster! When I had my daughter my husband did everything he could to help, he was amazing!!! I had a lot of back problems too and my husband did his best to lift the baby and put her where I needed her, so if I were you I would do some talking and chew him out for being so lazy!

    HMHUTSON

    Answer by HMHUTSON at 5:58 AM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • Wow, he sounds like a big jerk and maybe you know why he has an ex-wife. I agree with the 1st poster too. To answer your q, yes my hubby did help with all 3 even though he had to be up at 6 every morning to go to work and then he would help when he came home.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:53 AM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • He needs to do his part and he's not! My hubby would do lots of the night shifts. The house is secondary now. You'll get into your groove in awhile, but is you are this sore, and still have other kids, and no help--you need it and he NEEDS to back off and pick up some slack!

    Teachermom01

    Answer by Teachermom01 at 9:27 AM on Mar. 15, 2009

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