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My 3 year old said she was gonna kill her stepdad and sister? how do i deal with this?

my 3 year old recently told my husband and his 5 year old that she was gonna kill them...she has heard this from her dad...i sit her down and talked to her about it and told her it was a very bad thing to say...i called her dad and told him what she said and he admitted to telling someone that...he said he would talk to her to...my husband stormed out of the house and stayed away until his little girl went home and he told me that he was not going to have her back around my little girl...there have been some hard ships for both of the girls they fuss and fight all of the time...but he makes it out to be all my kids fault thats not always true...i have disciplined my kid if i see her doing anything wrong and he has his too but the fussing and fighting has not got any better with either child...i need help and would appreciate any advice to help me...we are also expecting another baby in august...

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:06 AM on Mar. 15, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • men throw a damn monkey wrench in everything. so many men in my family and my in-laws think its funny to encourage my 3 yr old to swear. come on now. these men know just as well as we do (i hope) what is innappropriate for kids to hear. this drives me crazy.
    all i can say is just keep telling her what is not nice to say and why. what i have resorted to is " you dont repeat what pap and uncle jerry tell you, you know what you're not allowed to say".
    BubbysMom208

    Answer by BubbysMom208 at 11:14 AM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • This problem is not a child problem...It is an adult problem..I am talking about your EX,and your DH..Your EX needs to stop saying bad things about other people around your daughter. Your DH need to get a grip. It could happen but I doubt a 3 yo will/or can kill anyone.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:21 AM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • They need to realize that children are sponges, they soak up the good and bad behavior from the adults in their lives... Your Husband needs to back you up with the girls, if they aren't getting along then you both need to sit down with them together and discipline them... Then they will see that they are equal. Also if you're going to be a family then you need to act like one no matter the situation, when our boys are fighting I remind them that we are a family, and in a family we care for and love each other and will forever so we have to work as a unit, not separately... GL
    4x4mum

    Answer by 4x4mum at 11:42 AM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • Now think about it from the blood parents point of view... if a child (of any age) said they were going to kill you and your child, would it not affect you? It would me even tho I don't think a 3 yr old would know how to go about killing anyone and likely has no idea what it really even means but if anyone said that to my child, it would bother me. On the other hand, your ex shouldn't even be joking and saying that to anyone (isn't that a terroristic threat?) but especially not in front of a child, but he realizes what he did was wrong and is going to talk to her, and your current hubby, well, he's got to understand that she's a little 3 yr old, she doesn't realize what she's saying. It sounds to me like he's looking for a reason to fight. I think the two of you need to sit down and have a serious conversation about this before it affects both of those children
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 12:00 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • puleeeeeze! We are all adults, this is a three year old! It's not about anyone's right or wrong side. The kid picked up something she shouldn't have(which happens). I'm sure the other child is just fine by now. If you can't handle a three year old saying that to your child then don't put them in school, because they will hear a lot worse! I think it's a bunch of adults who obviously don't get along for whatever other reasons, reading into a situation too much. Sounds like mom already handled it and took responsibilty for her child at that should have been the end of it. The kids are already over it.
    Steff107

    Answer by Steff107 at 12:27 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • I think you handled everything the way you should have.I think your dh overreacted, she is only 3.Really what harm could she do?If she were a teen, I could see being prtoective.I'm in a similar situation as you(blended family).It is really hard.sometimes you are damned if you do and damned if you don't.sometimes with your current husband, you are wrong no matter what you do.and it sucks.Maybe you can talk to dh when he calms down.and when he is being more reasonable.Stepmoms and step kids always turn out to be the enemy. I don't know why either.
    evelynwest

    Answer by evelynwest at 12:36 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • I think your husband is slightly over reacting,a little girl obviosouly heard someone say something and copied it its not that big of a deal,tell your husband to get over himself
    Aimee789135

    Answer by Aimee789135 at 3:32 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

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