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Husband of 52 not interested in sex

Married 25 years. Husband works long hours 6 days a week. It has been 4 months since we have had sex. He has had several affairs and cyber sex in our marriage. Is there no sex here due to work,age, or lack of desire for me? I no longer pursue him or try to seduce him. I have tried on 2 different occasions to discuss our lack of sex and how I don't like it.That this should be a decision the two of us should make as a couple..If not we needed to get help whether it be medical or counseling..I never get a comment...just a deer in the headlight look!! I'm done talking to the old fool..I just stopped touching him and take care of my own needs. Any suggestions for the 50 year old fool?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:44 PM on Mar. 15, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • He needs to get his health checked. At his age there are several health conditions that can cause lack of sexual desire. I am so sorry!!
    kemclaughlin

    Answer by kemclaughlin at 3:15 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • " he has had several affairs and cyber sex in our marriage"


    Not to be rude but, then why are you with him? If my husband ever cheated on me i would be gone in a heartbeat.... without a second thought. Maybe his lack of interest in sex with you is because he is getting it somewhere else. once a cheater always a cheater. I am genuinely sorry for your situation and i hope that it works out for you!

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:23 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • Sorry to say this but it seems to me like he is cheating. You should leave him. That is not right. No one deserves to be treated like that. I can only image how your feeling. He seriously needs to give you an answer to your questions or there needs to be a serious discussion about the marriage and why it's not working for you or the both of you. I know you probably love him and what ever we say won't matter. All I can say is it's your live and only you can decide what you will and can live with in a relationship. Good Luck.
    robibaby

    Answer by robibaby at 3:37 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • don't feel bad, my husband is 32, and I'm 18... he works late into the night, and he never wants to have sex with me :(. You're not alone... you should leave him though... I can't right now because my daughter is only 3 weeks old
    not-so-des-hw

    Answer by not-so-des-hw at 3:56 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • My husband is 47 and not interested.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:02 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • He may have some kind of physical condition and he is too embarrassed to let you know about it. I would insist on his getting himself checked out. My husband and I have been married 44 years, and he is now 65, and this has never been a problem in our marriage. So, you cannot just believe that it is because of his age. Diabetes, a lot of blood pressure meds, and a lot of other things can have sexual side effects. Nowdays, there is a lot that can be done if it turns out to be physical. It could also be psychological, so I think you really need a doctor's opinion, and you need to go with him so you know exactly what the problem is. Do remember, though, that this is an extremely sensitive area in a man's life, and you certainly don't want to do anything to make that worse.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 4:04 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • I'm with anon 3:23. Perhaps his lack of sex is because he's getting his needs met elsewhere. Or there could be a health problem (blood pressure or diabetes) that are causing ED. If he's not willing to get help and work with you, I don't know what you can do! Just express that you love him and that you have needs. Maybe that will open the door.

    Austinsmom35

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 7:07 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • This will probablly not be the popular answer but why not ask him if he wants an open marriage, you may be surprised by his response....and you can either leave him and find someone else or stay together and have one...either way seems better than a sexless life....

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:45 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • My thinking is he is embarrassed. How about talking to a doctor?
    mmmegan38

    Answer by mmmegan38 at 11:02 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

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