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I need some advice about my mother in law. Every time she comes in contact with my 8 month old daughter she has to use profanity, and tries to teach it to her, she often calls my daughter a little S***head. I have told her I don't like it and asked my husband to say something but he told me she will do what she wants. because of this I refuse to let her watch my baby and my husband finds it unfair. Am I wrong to not let her watch my baby. how else should I handle this?

She still sees my daughter at least 3 times a week. I just don't want to leave my baby with her without my supervision. My mother in law taught her other granddaughter who is 2 years old to talk like a sailor every word that comes out of the little girls mouth is F*** My mother in law finds it funny. I don't want that to happen to my little girl.

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lilybug08

Asked by lilybug08 at 7:32 PM on Mar. 15, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

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Answers (19)
  • No I would not let her see your child. She can't be respectful around her own grandchild, she doesn't deserve her and shame on your hubby for not putting his foot down.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:34 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • I don't blame ya there. it is not cute at all when little ones use profanity. I think that it is pretty crappy that she calls your dd a little S**tHead. that is not a nick name that you want your ittybitty to have. If your husband sees nothing wrong with it you should start calling him your BIG Shit Head and see how he likes it.
    travelmom72

    Answer by travelmom72 at 7:38 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • I would talk to her yourself, and tell her as an adult and as a mother, that you don't appreshiate the way she talks infront of your little girl. If she can't understand that then tell her how it is. I wouldnt say anything that she may take offense as to her mothering. As for your husband, he's supposed to stand with you, he's an adult, he shouldn't be mothers boy anymore...
    MamaStrawBerry1

    Answer by MamaStrawBerry1 at 7:38 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • I always go with the rule that "would you let a stranger or neighbour do this with your child". If the answer is no (to any type of activity/behaviour), then why would it be okay for a family member to do something. I think alot of people "cave in" when family is involved. BUT...you are really the one responsible for the upbringing of your child, so you need to have it the way that you are most comfortable with. Ask him why he won't speak to her about it. Is he afraid of her response? Does he agree with her behaviour? You need to let him know that if he doesn't speak to her about it, you will, and it probably won't go well because you're the daughter-in-law, not her own. Explain to him that she will be much more receptive hearing it from her own son, and probably respect him more as a parent if he lays down the law of how he wants his own child brought up. I'm sure it'll be tough...but she is your child.
    EireLass

    Answer by EireLass at 7:38 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • I dont think you are wrong. my mother-in- law instist that her rules are better than mine and try to give my 9 month old daughter Coffee!!!!! My suggestion is to not let her watch him and sit down with her and talk to her about your feelings on it and if she still continues decrease the amount she is aloud to watch him.
    SabrenaLeigh

    Answer by SabrenaLeigh at 7:39 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • short and sweet---tell her she cannot see her until the language is cleaned up. Hold out for a few weeks and stick to your guns, and if she truly loves her and respects you, she will change.
    kscmbz

    Answer by kscmbz at 7:39 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • Shithead? That's awful!!!! I don't blame you!
    BridgetC140

    Answer by BridgetC140 at 7:41 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • Honey I know it is hard but, as she gets older she will pick this up and omg when you are out and she does that you are going to want to run and hide!!!! No you are not in the wrong!! Let the mother-inlaw know that this is your child and that you will not put up with this cuz in the long run your little girl will be getting in trouble because of her.
    rachabro

    Answer by rachabro at 7:41 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • I wouldn't allow her to see her grandchild either. That's a horrible thing to say to a child, what a horrible grandma! If she has a problem you should say, "Here's some profanity you should learn, B**** stay the F*** away from my child!!!" Maybe she will get the point of how pathetic she is. Your husband should be doing something about it to, but maybe he is just used to it because I'm sure he did it to him too.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:43 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • She would NOT be allowed to shee my baby at all! I wouldn't care what my SO said!!!
    mominbolt

    Answer by mominbolt at 7:46 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

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