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What do I say to a friend whos exhusband killed himself?

I just found out my friends exhusband killed himself today. I want to call and tell her how sorry I am and offer any help (altho I'm in a differant state) but don't want to say anything insensitive...what do I say? They have a child togather.
I'm in shock right now.

Answer Question

Asked by KimSanAntonio at 10:04 PM on Mar. 15, 2009 in Relationships

Level 2 (12 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • You say "I'm so sorry for yours and your son's loss, is there anything I can do for you? If there ever is, please don't hesitate to ask".

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 10:06 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • Call her and express your condolences for their child. Ask how the child is handling it, and if there is anything you can do for them (even though you live in another state). The best thing to do is call and let your friend talk, if she wants to. Just listen - that's probably what she needs right now.

    Answer by dragonfly7271 at 10:06 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • Tell her that you are sorry and that if she wants to talk you would be glad to listen. If you are close friends you may want to offer to come visit her.

    Answer by Bmat at 10:08 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • She will need friends at a time like this, just call and tell her how sorry you are and your there for her. She might just need someone to talk to and you can do that from any distance.

    Answer by nannabart at 10:30 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • Ok, my brother killed himself. Trust me support is what your friend needs. Call and let her talk. If she dose not feel like talking you talk to her. She can listen. Her loss is great and she will be feeling a huge amount of guilt. People who loose a family member to suicide feel (I did) like I didn't deserve someones compassion. Since my brother choose to end his life.
    Keep calling, keep talking and tell her to go on line and find a support group. I joined on on It is called friends and family suicide support. If you would like more information please pm me.
    Your friend will need support now and even more in a few months when people stop noticing that she has lost someone.

    Answer by mmmegan38 at 10:37 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

  • You say the same thing you would tell a friend who's lost a loved one. That you are sorry for her loss and that you are there for her any time. Maybe check on her now and then and tell her you're thinking about her. Don't push her to talk about it. But if she wants to - just listen.

    Answer by kathyartist2007 at 10:45 PM on Mar. 15, 2009

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