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Any suggestions?

Okay i am starting to not only get frustrated but a little worried. . . In the last week my DH and I have got it on five times and out of those five times three times he want able to finish. . He ended up finishing by maturbating. . .the two times that he finished we were not facing each other. . Why could he finish when my back was turned but not when we were looking at each other. . We have only been together for six years. What can I do?

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Asked by Anonymous at 8:53 AM on Mar. 16, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • I really think worry about the economy is hits men and ourselves some times very bad. Did you take him by storm and shock him, meaning if it all went by so fast those few times then maybe he just wasn't ready to load. If he's not giving you any other reason that there's another woman - work habits change to work with another woman, business trips with a woman, out to bars w buddies more, cell phone calls texts unknown. If known of that is going on he's probably just tired way deep inside. Can you increase foreplay and time up to foreplay? Relax and load those two things are key I think.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:01 AM on Mar. 16, 2009

  • You need to talk to him about it with empathy. Men have these huge egos and as a wife, you need to make sure you don't hurt it. Tell him how you feel and say you want to try different thigs to spice things up...make it interesting. There are many books to help you with favorite is the Kama Sutra. Tried and tested!
    p.s. I've been married for almost 18 years and still have an exciting passionate relationship with my DH

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:01 AM on Mar. 16, 2009

  • Is there some problem or issue going on right now between you and him? Maybe he feels guilty about wanting sex? Who is initiating the sex the 5 times this week? When he finished himself off, were you still right there or did he go somewhere else? Did you offer to help out those times? were you getting dry or had you already orgasmed or not?

    There could be all kinds of things going on here, we need more info.

    Answer by JustAMom2008 at 9:21 AM on Mar. 16, 2009

  • When it comes to in initiates it it has has been equal. .I stay in the room with him, i help him by doing htings that i have done before. . There has been one time where it had lasted 45 minutes and then i started to dry...I don't think there are eny problems that we havent worked out. I am just starting to feel like i cant perform well enought to satisfy him.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:46 AM on Mar. 16, 2009

  • Once in a while my hubby has a problem like that. He says it just isn't hitting the right spot. At different times of the month we're naturally more wet or dry, and sometimes all it takes is a little tilt to the pelvis to make it hit the right spot for him and for me. The not facing you thing is something that would drive someone like me crazy wondering about, but chances are it's not you, it's just the angle.

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 10:04 AM on Mar. 16, 2009

  • I think it's a fantasy thing when we turn away. I think it's exciting for them to pretend to be with a nameless faceless partner. It doesn't mean he doesn't love you.

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:22 AM on Mar. 16, 2009

  • I have to agree with the position idea that : lisa_ann_p stated.. especially since that position makes you tighter for them and able to get deeper. Have you tried playing with him while you are having sex? I know SO loves when I play with his nuts while we are going at it. The best thing to suggest, is to get a book on positions, that describe what they do for a man, and work on it together.. I'm sure he will be pleased that you are going out of your way to please him,and you will be happy, noticing that it wasn't you at all. Good luck.

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 12:35 PM on Mar. 16, 2009

  • I agree if there hasn't been any real pattern changes in your personal life it could be stress. Also how old is your DH? Sometimes age has a factor to it. Get a great book on sexual massage and I agree the Kama Sutra book is a great thing to have as well. Sometime when you do a nice massage before it helps them relax and destress and everyone wins. My DH is older than I am and it helps him to not just have to jump in to the whole thing sometimes and we have found different levels of intimacy in our relationship because of it.

    Answer by swhithorn at 1:50 PM on Mar. 16, 2009

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