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Very strange custody case... please read

Long story short... BIL is trying to get custody of his son. ExGF has a new boyfriend who is very abusive. BIL and dcf have a keep away order for his son on this man. They went to court and gave dcf custody but the parents can keep him for now. So the same day she went and married him, this was a week ago. She is not stable and I am scared for my nephew. What I am wondering is if she somehow gets custody of the baby, does that mean her new husband can be near him? She has him right now and I don't trust she will keep her new husband away, dcf apparently is not concerned about that. He has already broken a court order on this once. Ant advice would be great. I did so many Google searches but could not come up with cases like this one. She will not leave him, this she told us by getting married... he is more important then her baby.

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Asked by hipmama185 at 1:55 PM on Mar. 16, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (4)
  • It depends on the judge. My husband's brother went through something similar except the mother was a drug addict as well. The judge told her that her children should be more important than a man. She said, "you can't tell me who I can and cannot be with." He basically said no, but I can take your kids away from you. The bigger the stink your BIL makes by taking her to court over and over, the more the judge will need to open his eyes. Either way, he needs to get his lawyer involved. Every case is different and every judge is different.

    Answer by DDry at 1:59 PM on Mar. 16, 2009

  • Iagree also your BIL has the right to report the violation of the court order to the police/sheriff depending on where your at they can remove the child or make the guy leave. it doesn't matter if she married him if the restraining order is still active and in place he can not be near that child

    Answer by swhithorn at 2:13 PM on Mar. 16, 2009

  • They won't make the guy leave, they will arrest him! And the more violations he gets on this case that she allows the stronger your BIL case will be. This will act as proof to the courts that she is not acting in the best interest of the child AND that she apparently lacks the respect of the courts order (which they don't like one bit). I assume this guy did something to the child to get an order against him so obviously he is unsafe to be around the kid. Your BIL needs to file a request for modification of custody and protect his kid, and have the mom have supervised visits at the child welfare offices (yes they do that).

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:55 PM on Mar. 16, 2009

  • I agree with the PPs...marital status has no bearing on restraining or court mandated orders. If the guy was ordered to not be around the child, then he can not be around the child..period. A lawyer should know of circumstances similar to this (such as when a bio-dad has abused a child and there is a state protective order that the dad can't live at the home while the child is there, even thought he is married to the mom and the bio-dad). Tell your BIL to get a lawyer and good luck with everything!

    Answer by ozarkgirl3 at 6:22 PM on Mar. 16, 2009

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