I love my husband & kids more than life itself only i kept secrets from him for 8 years & we've been married 11. I recently admitted to him 2 men i slept with 8 yrs. ago. Our marriage was beautiful, happy & he says a lie & that hurts me so bad, i never realized what a HUGE HORRIFIC mistake i was making & made until now that we're seperated & away from eachother. Seeing my kids without a completed family tears me apart & not being able to touch or see my husband is the worst pain i've ever felt ever. I talk to him daily & he still has questions & feels hate for what i did, i dont blame him but how & when will this end? what can i do to help him get thru this? to make him believe i am trustworthy now and that i also feel emotional distress & not just him. It's been 2 weeks now, i dont think i can handle another day!...PLEASE SOMEONE I NEED ADVICE! :-(
Asked by Anonymous at 3:57 PM on Mar. 17, 2009 in Relationships
I commend you for coming clean. But you do have to realize this is your bad.. you cant put a time limit on his forgiveness. And in his defense it was 2 men..not just one. My suggestion is similar to the other ladies.. see if he is willing to go to counseling, tell him you don't want your marriage to end. Let him know you are willing to work at getting his trust back. Its easy to say "it was so long ago" he should be over it.. but he JUST found out about it..you have had the last 8 years to come to terms with it. Give him time. This is hard. Put yourself in his place.. wouldn't you need some time and answers? Just keep your head up. Your kids need you. Focus on them and remain committed to showing him you are sorry for the pain you caused. There is no quick easy fix for this one. You guys can get through this but its going to take patience. I wish you the best and hope all works out. I will be praying for you both.
Answer by Tzutchka at 8:11 PM on Mar. 17, 2009
Answer by AK_aries at 4:00 PM on Mar. 17, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 4:01 PM on Mar. 17, 2009
Answer by avpriddis at 4:02 PM on Mar. 17, 2009
Answer by SThompson21 at 4:02 PM on Mar. 17, 2009
Answer by onyourterms at 4:03 PM on Mar. 17, 2009
I would like to know why you even told him about it in the first place??Didn't you realize he was going to be mad about it. You are the cheater..You will just have to wait tell he is ready to forgive you. He might not ever want to be with you again...So I say,,get on with your life. Stop waiting for him.
Answer by louise2 at 4:07 PM on Mar. 17, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 4:10 PM on Mar. 17, 2009
Answer by diamondmamma at 4:17 PM on Mar. 17, 2009
Answer by 4x4mum at 4:19 PM on Mar. 17, 2009