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What do I do about my angry 5 yr old?

My 5 year old daughter gets so angry about everything. She acts out by being physically mean and verbally abusive to anyone who is near. This evening I told her it was time to come inside and she looked me in the eye and told me I was stupid and she hated me. A couple minutes later my brother tried to help by putting her in her room and she called him an a** hole and told him to get out. She has acted like this before but it seems to be getting way worse and I have tried to calm her down , ignore her, comfort her, time out. Please help I dont know what to do. Her brother gets mad too but not like this.

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Asked by Kamiko8 at 10:11 PM on Mar. 17, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (6)
  • You need to stop her now. My son was violent for a short time and I just tried to stay calm and talk to him. I talked about better ways to deal with his anger and other feelings. I talked about how hitting hurts people and is not acceptable. I also took him to a counselor for anger management and that really helped. His school counselor also helped us out. Whatever you do, DO NOT HIT HER, it will just show her that it is ok to hit someone. Talk to her and find out why she is so angry and how you can help her. Wait until she is calm and you can talk to her alone. Tell her how much you love her and want her to be safe and happy. When she is violent and calms down, make her apologize to anyone she has hurt and take away priveleges or toys. Best of luck, I have been there and it is very frustrating.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 10:28 PM on Mar. 17, 2009

  • Check her diet. Is she eating a lot of processed food? Lot of artificial colors flavors? High fructose corn syrup? These can cause anger & aggressive behaviors.

    Answer by motherofhope98 at 8:41 AM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • I have tried taking her stuff away from her and she does not care. I have also tried talking to her calmy and telling her how I feel when she acts this way and have asked her why she feels so angry and she just starts her fit all over again. It comes and goes in spurts. She can be the sweetest girl in the worl and at the drop of a hat she is angry. I will check into a councelor. She eats fairly healthy foods, no soda or junk like that. I will keep you updated. Thanks.

    Answer by Kamiko8 at 9:11 AM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • You need to tell her that her behavior is unacceptable, she CAN NOT talk to you like that. Be firm, do not yell, do not hit, do not allow anyone else to intervene. You tell her something, she listens. If she does not listen, follow through with a consequence. 5 minutes in the corner for instance. She won't go, at first, so you pick her up and put her there. She will get up. Put her back. Over and over and over again. Don't give up, I went through this when I took custody of my nephews. I had to do this for 31/2 hours once. Eventually it will work. This will not be a one time battle, but it worth it. Don't give up. Your DD is counting on you.

    Answer by mlregalado at 12:14 PM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • Thank you for the advice I will try this. She is worst after she comes back from dad's house, so he may have something to do with it. She is very physical when she is angry. I have tried to hug her and calm her down and she hits and kicks me but I will try the time out and putting her back when she gets up.

    Answer by Kamiko8 at 4:57 PM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • I am so frusterated, I dont know what to do with her anymore. I am on the last notch.

    Answer by Kamiko8 at 10:14 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

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