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what you can do if your husband is acontroul your life and you cant do nothing beacouse you have no job

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salam590

Asked by salam590 at 3:23 PM on Mar. 18, 2009 in Relationships

Level 2 (0 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • Girl you need to stand up and take action on this... Go out and get a job, even part time... Dont let him rule you cause you will never give it back till you are fed up and leave him.... You dont need all this pressure right now...
    HottMamaRossx2

    Answer by HottMamaRossx2 at 3:26 PM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • better yourself somehow...go to school...etc, if your relationship is bad maybe you should put some money aside and save it away for yourself.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:27 PM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • It's a choice that you are making. You are choosing to stay with him, just like you are choosing to allow him to control your life. It's up to you to take charge. If you have a home computer, start researching online colleges so that you can get the education that you need. If your husband refuses to let you go to college there are women's shelters that you can go to or leave and move in with family. Controlling someone is not loving them and people often get that confused. You are not helpless you can do whatever it is that you set your mind to. GL

    legalmommy101

    Answer by legalmommy101 at 3:29 PM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • Get job training. Watch the want ads and get a job. If you are afraid, then get out. It is a good idea to open a bank account in your own name and to get money in there if you can so that you'll have some if needed. See if he'll get counseling. You must have loved him at one time, but it doesn't sound as though that love is there now. Love is trusting and helping and caring. There are cases where a wife spends every cent she gets her hands on, so the husband tries to keep the family from going broke by handling all the money, if this is your situation, then you should still get an allowance.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 3:32 PM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • as hard as it may seem you do need to stop this some how and if it means leaving then you need to. I was in a very controling relationship for 13yrs so I know how hard it is to leave but i did, and it wasn't as scary as I thought it would be. There are places for you to get help. Go to your local department of health and social services, they can give you some advice

    good luck to you. Everyone deservse to have a happy life
    momoffive0222

    Answer by momoffive0222 at 3:35 PM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • Never rely on anyone for anything. ALWAYS be able to take care of you and your children no matter what.. Your husband knows this and he is using it to his advantage, and you need to stop it,and you can if you want too. Get help from outside, somehow, but, don't let him control you any longer. Somehow get a job, and be able to take care of things.If he loves you he will straighten up, if he doesn't, what have you lost?Some men like having a woman depend on them. Can you get help somewhere?
    Kat122

    Answer by Kat122 at 4:51 PM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • Nobody can control you without your permission. You aren't a object of possession you are a person. Do you have family or a good friend to talk to? I'm sure you didn't get married and have a child to be "owned" by someone who thinks because he pays the bills he can control you. There are many avenues of support available to you. If you are that unhappy and are getting depressed, your local hospital can give you the names of agencies and support groups that will be of assistance to you. Let the cycle stop here. You don't want your daughter (or son) to get the message that this is okay. There are things you can do even if you don't have a formal education or degree. Things you can do even with a child. The important thing is to realize NOBODY OWNS YOU. NOBODY. YOU CANNOT BE BOUGHT. Take charge of your life and see what happens. God Bless You.
    grandmalinda707

    Answer by grandmalinda707 at 5:07 PM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • That wouldn't happen to me. I don't believe in allowing anyone to control me. Stand up and be a woman. Get a job and start to control yourself. Don't allow him to minipulate you into thinking you need him. Get up and go work for what you want.
    mommatime78

    Answer by mommatime78 at 7:10 PM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • Whatever I needed to get away. You are using not having a job as an excuse to not leave. You don't need him. Find someone who can help you, get out, go back to school, get skills and get a job. There are shelters and women's groups that can help you leave.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 7:29 PM on Mar. 18, 2009

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