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This is a embarrassing question, but my 2 year old wont stop playing with herself, it all started when my friends daughter and my daughter were in the bath and they were laying on there stomachs I thought nothing of it, and now she is always doing it and it is really nasty, I am scared to ask her pediatrician, my husband and i only hug around our kids. I dont know how to get her to stop and she does it everywhere

and she tries on my leg and i scream at her telling its gross. Can someone please help me? No matter what I do she never stops she even does it when shes asleep.

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Asked by Anonymous at 8:06 PM on Mar. 18, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

Answers (12)
  • Well first off dont scream at her. She is just exploring something new. At 2 she has no idea that it is gross or private. Most kids do this from time to time. Its nothing to be embarrased about.

    Just try to keep her hands busy with toys, books, and crayons. If you see her doing it, remove her hand and distract her. But dont scold her, its just a normal part of growing up

    Answer by mom2twobabes at 8:09 PM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • Dont yell at her its normal for her to experiment with herself...we all did at that age. By yelling at her and tellig its gross you are going to break down her self esteem and make her think she is doing someting wrong and her privates are never to be touched. Rather only let her do it in the bathroom. I let me son go buck wild in the tub...what ever he wants and if he tries to do it anywhere else I tell him no no thats for the bathtime not now honey. Just try to work on the "in private" thing with her

    Answer by Bugsmommy1908 at 8:09 PM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • You shouldn't tell her it's gross or make her feel bad for doing it she actually doesn't even know what she's doing. If you make her feel guilty for doing it she will feel ashamed later in life for her sexuality and probably not come talk to you about it. If you have such a huge problem with it politely ask her to do it in her room. It's just something kids do they don't know this world well and they are trying different things so give her some space and let her be or it'll be harmful later in life.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:10 PM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • its completely natural for her to explore herself, toddlers have no clue about what is socially acceptable, nor would i really worry about that in the privacy of your own home. This is done because of instincts which are there for many reasons to help humans develop sexuality properly. I think you should allow her to do whatever she needs to do in private. But in public distract her with something to do, and u can explain that it is ok for people to touch themselves there but they do this in their homes or bedrooms and thats what she should do too.

    Answer by JTNMD711 at 8:17 PM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • Maybe she's mimicking you

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:17 PM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • anon: go find something else to do.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:18 PM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • First of all, this is a normal behavior. Screaming at her and telling her it's gross is going to give her sexual issues. What you need to do is take her aside and try to calmly explain to her that she shouldn't do that in public or in front of others. Tell her than anything to do with that area (whatever you call it) is private and should be done in private...that she can't do it in front of you. Also, try to distract her with other activities that will keep her hands and her mind busy. I've read that some kids who are lacking stimulation will engage in chronic masturbation. But please understand that masturbation is normal at this age. It is a form of self-exploration and she will more than likely get tired of it of doing it all the time, the way she is.

    Answer by moniquinha at 8:18 PM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • how is it gross? shes just exploring herself. you seem to be the gross minded one.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:07 PM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • I have a book (I'll have to look up the name), but it actually talked about this and that you're not supposed to discourage it. Of course, in public you probably should. I was completely shocked to see this, but I guess it's normal.

    Answer by DAjZeZnLE at 9:11 PM on Mar. 18, 2009

  • I don't want to sound like a broken record here, but I think the more you hear it the more your mind will feel at ease. This is normal you just need to coach her to do it in private. Make sure you are gentle with this subject because you will give her sexual issues as an adult. This is also probably a good time to teach her that only she should touch her privates and nobody else should and to tell them no if they try, etc.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:10 AM on Mar. 19, 2009

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