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how do i save my marriage?

I am so stressed, I dont like taking my stress out on my DH but i cant take doing everything on my own. He is working he doest stay at home to help with the kids. I work four days a week 12 to 13 hours a day. I dont make enough to take care of everything on my own, but all he can do is tell me that i am being inconsiderate of what he wants to do. I just want him to help pay for some of his expenses. after all he helped make our three children.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:06 AM on Mar. 19, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • my SO and I are gonna try marriage counseling maybe you and your husband can give it a shot other than that I don't know what to tell you. Sorry
    Breezy1988

    Answer by Breezy1988 at 8:18 AM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • Wait you're MARRIED, your husbands WORKS, and YOU have to pay for everything? That doesn't make any sense!

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:50 AM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • If he is wasting money, consider setting up a separate bank account to which he does not have access. It just sounds like he is very immature, and that's not really grounds for divorce, because he had to have been immature when you married him. You cannot change him, but you can change yourself. Don't allow yourself to think in terms of being the victim. Think of positive things that you can do to make things better for yourself. Taking care of three children alone and having to pay all the bills alone will not make your life easier. If there is anything positive about your husband, compliment him on those things. Try to stop harping on the negatives. It only makes them worse. You can tell him what you need him to do to help you out. You can tell him that by helping you, he will make you a better wife and you will have more time for him. You can play to his selfishness and he just might turn himself around.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 9:02 AM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • THE EXPENSES OF YOUR HOUSEHOLD SHOULD BE PAID WITH THE JOINT MONEY THAT COMES IN, IT SHOULDN'T BE YOURS AND HIS, IT SHOULD BE OURS. THAT IS YOUR MISTAKE, TREATING THE JOINT INCOME AS A WHOLE NOT HIS AND MINE
    older

    Answer by older at 9:59 AM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • Wow! Is he keeping his check or do you have a joint account? If he's keeping his money and you're only paying for the utilities I would put a password on the cable, pay for only your cell phone and disconnect the main phone. The electricity, you have to keep it and he can use it. But I would not allow him to benefit from anything I was paying for if he couldn't contribute both time and money to the household.

    Austinsmom35

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 10:24 AM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • i'd tell him he needs to pay half the bills....i believe it should be completely 50/50
    Love_My_Lil_One

    Answer by Love_My_Lil_One at 10:29 AM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • So i meant to say that he isnt working he hasnt worked in over two months. He expects me to just understand that he doesnt want to have to work for someone else.
    mandic

    Answer by mandic at 10:52 AM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • HELL no He is the MAN of the house, therefore he should be the main provider. If he is not willing to help with the expenses, then he needs to be kicked to the curb.. It is time to put your foot down and tell him get a JOB OR GET OUT. That is my opinion..
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:16 AM on Mar. 19, 2009

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