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Caught hubby masterbating to porn.....what would you do?

I am so sad and hurt that he would do that instead of try to make love to me.....I don't understand....

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 3:04 PM on Mar. 19, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (36)
  • tell him that its you or his hand

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:06 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • Did you talk to him about it? Have you been saying no to him often? Masturbating is normal and natural, so it is possible that he was supplementing your lovemaking, not replacing it.

    Answer by Kaelaasmom at 3:06 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • Unless it is something he is doing all the time, don't worry about it.

    Answer by Marwill at 3:07 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • It would not bother me, but it does you, so talk with him. Tell him that you feel hurt and see how he responds. Communication is the key. GL!

    Answer by kboney29 at 3:08 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • I would have undressed and joined in.

    Answer by coutterhill at 3:08 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • I'm sure he's done it most of his life. You just happened to catch him this time. It's not like he is going to stop but tell him to be fair and take care of your needs as well.

    Answer by admckenzie at 3:09 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • Had this happen to me. Not a good feeling. It caused major problems in our relationship. We are no longer together.
    The only thing you can do is be real, tell him how that makes you feel, either you can work something out or he is an ass. Hopefully this will get better. I am sorry. I know your pain. Good Luck!!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:09 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • someone actually ended a relationship because of problems stemmed from jacking off??? That made my day!!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:12 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • Anon 312 I don't think it was the "jacking off" it was that he was watching porn and to some women that's like being cheated on.


    Answer by Anonymous at 3:15 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • This happened to me too. I talked to DH about it and found out from him that he was feeling neglected by me sexually b/c I was focusing so much on our son. But, it could be a number of other things. Sometimes men choose masturbation because there is no pressure to perform. He could be under a lot of stress from work or something else and just want to release some of it without the pressure of having to also please someone else. You should talk to him and ask him how he feels about it. But try to remember that your man looking at porn is not necessarily a reflection of how he feels about you. I know it's hard not to take it personally, but boys will be boys.

    Answer by moniquinha at 3:16 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

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