Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Words of encouragement..

I'm feeling blue. My SO has been talking to this girl that he used to date, and I just found out about it. He sent her pics of his d*ck and has been telling her to call him while he's away at work. Being the usual man, he claims that he never sent those pics. Yea they were taken by him web cam on his lap top. He keeps denying that they talked more than once, even though I've proven it to be more than that. This is a never ending battle with him. He can't not talk to this girl, and when I try to leave he starts to cry, claiming that he'll be better. I'm so tired of caring,of hurting. I just want it to stop. So he cleaned out all his contacts, blocked people he shouldn't talk to. Is this is? Is he finally done? No bashing please, I'm in a really bad place inside and I just want some one to tell me it'll be worth it.. that it'll be okay.. that I'll want to stay as a family, that things will change.. I'm so tired inside cont..

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:13 PM on Mar. 19, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • it sounds to me that he wants to stay together as a family. and that he loves u. im sure he'll start to prove himself to u.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:16 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • I'm guessing you're still writting the cont. part as I read this. You posted a question a while about this didn't you? I'm so sorry for yo right now. You do sound truly sad. If he will really give changing a shot and you want to wait for him to then I hope all goes well. Have you seen your dr? You may be depressed, you sound awfully hopeless. If he's not going to change don't give him the chance to completely drain you till you are empty inside.
    AmandaH321

    Answer by AmandaH321 at 6:18 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • OP Cont- (computer froze.. sorry ladies lol)
    I'm just tired inside all the time from this.. but I can't take this anymore.
    The only thing that gets me through the day is my daughter. I would be long gone and away from it all if it wasn't for her.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:22 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • To be completely honest, it sounds like you can't trust that he won't do it again. I'm sorry, I know that's not what you want to hear. If it was just him talking to the other girl (and if he admitted it), I wouldn't worry about it, but the pictures are a whole different ballgame.

    Again I'm sorry, but I just don't think that it'd be worth it to stay with him and continue to get your heart broken. You need to find someone who respects you enough to forget about his past and be happy with living in the present with you. What he is doing with the talking to her but not letting you leave is probably going to be an endless cycle that he won't be able to break but you NEED to.

    It'll be okay. You might be at a bad place right now but I know you'll find the strength to get out of it. I have faith in you. Good luck! And don't be afraid to reach out in person to those around you.
    AmberBrat

    Answer by AmberBrat at 6:28 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • how long have you been together? was he dating another girl prior to youi\? that would help answer if i would stay or go.
    hellonwheelsmom

    Answer by hellonwheelsmom at 7:21 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • I just hate to say this, but that is simply awful behavior for someone who is supposed to love you. It's unacceptable. I know it's brutal but I don't know, I think I'd try and leave him regardless of his crying. Actions speak louder than words. If he's done this multiple times, what could possibly make him change? He's not doing it for you or his daughter. He's just being selfish. I mean, pics of his willy? Really? Forget it. You deserve someone better and it takes time but it WILL be okay.
    jeanclaudia

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 7:29 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • Honestly, I feel that he's never going to stop you keep on forgiving and he keeps on thinking that he's going to get away with it by crying and saying he'll do better. It would be a completely different story if it were you who was taking pix for other guys dont put up with it anymore obviously he's not gonna change
    Breezy1988

    Answer by Breezy1988 at 7:36 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • There is no relationship ifthere is no turst. Heard that before? But it s true!!
    Beleive me , ive been there.
    Break it down, you are controlled by his behavior. Its depriving you from trusting him right?
    Talk to him .Set a CLEAR boundry line as to what he cant cross. Give your part in the relationship completly...and if the cheating continues, you can say you tired girl. God wants you to be happy. And willing to give him a chance. Try untill you cant try anymore...if things are still the same, you can say you tried, and tried.. Sometimes we cant change people, and we have to make sure our family is okay. This is only tenporary. We are NOT ment to live this way. We are ment to live our life and learn as we go..this is ONLY TEMPORARY!! hang in there!!
    At the end its your choice...but make that step to allow a change in your life !! HUGS!!
    aMbeR012005

    Answer by aMbeR012005 at 7:36 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • no it's not over. He just changed his email address to one you can't find. You won't stop him. These guys are addicted to the attention they get. They won't give it up for you or anyone. Accept it or leave. (not bashing. talking from experience)
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:50 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • Hopefully he will stop being sneaky and deceitful, unfortunately, from experience, once a dog always a dog. But you never know, maybe he will change his ways. KEEP HOPE alive:(
    mamofive

    Answer by mamofive at 9:44 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.