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My 14yr. old soon to be 15, came to me and just blew me away with something.

My 14yr. old just came to me and said she wants me to meet someone in about a month or so, i just knew she was about to say her boyfriend, but she said her girlfriend!!!! Someone please help me out. What do I do? What do I say? I haven't even told her dad she even mentioned this to me.

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Asked by Anonymous at 8:59 PM on Mar. 19, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (20)
  • This is not the end of the world. Just support her and be there for her. Don't tell her it's wrong and make it a big issue or it will backfire on you. She is still your daughter and she is no different because of her choice in a Bf or GF. Everything will be good.

    Answer by Christine0813 at 9:25 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • shes a teen they like to expirement and look at the bright side at least you dont have to worry she will end up pregnant

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:48 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • I would try to get her professional help and spank her butt and tell her to dump her if not u make her dump her or tell the dad i am sure he would know how to handle it. Thats what i would do if i was you

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:59 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • She is a teen and is probably experimenting, but even if she isn't I would just be there for her. Professional help and spankings aren't going to change her. If you force her to "dump" her friend, she will just sneak around to see her. You can't make a gay person straight by force just like you can't force a straight person to be gay. You will have to learn how to deal with it. Keep lines of communication open, don't freak out. She needs your love and support.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 11:00 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • don't panic. She might be doing it for attention. She might just have a friend who is a girl. She might just be finding herself as a person. Just remain calm and see it through. Don't over think it.

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:10 PM on Mar. 19, 2009

  • last poster hit it on the head. i would just be open minded. what can you do to change it? i would be dissapointed if it were the case but would stand by my daughter and lvoe her unconditionally

    Answer by ssnelson26 at 1:00 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • Don't do anything, be glad that she trusts you enough to tell you who she is with. But I'd still make sure that she understands that one can still get an STD from a girl so that she can protect herself.

    Answer by mlregalado at 1:30 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • I agree with the other posters. Considering the alternatives (like boys!), I'd just try to go with it. You might tell her that you hadn't imagined that kind of relationship for her, but it's her life and she'll make the right choices for her and you will stand behind her. Nevertheless, you can warn her as you would about any relationship. I don't think you are going to change her mind by revolting, so bite your tongue and try to go with the flow.

    Most teens are trying to find out what they want in life, just consider this is probably a learning experience.

    Answer by PhillyinFrance at 9:59 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • Shes still the same daughter you had before she came out. That was a very brave thing to do at such a young age. My son came out to me at 13. It wasn't a total shock, he exhibited signs at a pretty young age. It was still hard to take, but I wouldnt change hom for the world. The ridicule the kids got through from everyone is harmful. Just be there for your daughter, listen to her and love her with all your heart. My son is now 23, and likes the skin he's in. He's still the joy of my life. Tell her dad gently, and definitely before any meetings take place. Good luck and there are alot of websites out there to help you with what you are feeling. It's almost a grieving process, You mourn the loss of the life you dreamt for her, not mourning her. Love her most of all.

    Answer by DIANE463 at 10:03 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • be glad she came out to you. Maybe she is gay! Trust me there are worse things. Be supportive even if you don't agree with her choices. Maybe it's a phase maybe it isn't.

    Answer by pagirl71 at 1:03 PM on Mar. 20, 2009

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