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Should I turn her in?

My fiancee's kids BM has a warrant for her arrest for trespassing on our property and not paying the fine for it. I was wandering how serious a non paying fine warrant is...if we mention it in court when we go for custody the 23rd will they lock her up or should we call the police and tell them where she is when the kids have visitation with her Saturday at McDonalds for an hour...We want to get her so bad! She let her boyfriend abuse and SEVERELY bruise her babies (2 and 5) after we(us and our lawyer) begged her not to let him physically discipline the kids anymore
we have emergency temp custody

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HeatherMartin

Asked by HeatherMartin at 4:14 AM on Mar. 20, 2009 in General Parenting

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Answers (9)
  • I say turn her in on Saturday...the kids are worth the risk of her or her boyfriend being out. the further away they both are the better, and her going to jail will help you with custody
    Mikayla_lynn

    Answer by Mikayla_lynn at 4:45 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • I've personally never had to deal with a situation like this one before, but have seen first hand my family go through some horrible custody battles. Not paying a fine isnt to serious but can still end up getting you some jail time. As far as turning her in, I would think if she has visitation with the children then the police would know of her current visitation rights, unless it was settled out of court and not in front of a lawyer. Point being the children if you do have the police to pick her up while she is out with them it puts themi(the childrent) in a difficult situation on seeing her took away. I would suggest that you tell her to meet at your regular location regular time just act very calm nothings going on nothings different, then have someone to be your eyes to make sure she is there, act like your running late then have the police come, that way the children arent exposed to any "drama".
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:01 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • Talk to the lawyer and see which way would be better to your advantage. Whatever you do...don't let the kids be witness to their mom being hauled off!
    TiccledBlue

    Answer by TiccledBlue at 5:25 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • My advise is worry about you and yours. The children are what is important here and you need to think of how they would view things if they were aware of what is going on. It is best to protect the children and let your lawyer handle the hearing. The truth will be clear there and you should use all your energy in focussing on the outcome. Let her worry about her own police problems.
    greenAllie

    Answer by greenAllie at 7:29 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • Whatever you do, try not to let it happen so that she's arrested and handcuffed in front of her kids. I understand she was wrong and all, and the bf thing is inexcusable, but the kids are innocent and don't need to be subjected to any more drama.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:40 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • DO not let an arrest happen in front of the kids. If this can help remove those babies from a very bad situation I am ALL for it though. It may not guarantee that they'll get out, but it may work. Good luck.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:53 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • i agree with everyone... make sure she is NOT arrested around the kids that is horrifying to witness as a child & it may make the kids scared of cops when they shouldnt be.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:24 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • AGree about not letting the children see her being arrested. My sd witnessed the cops picking up her mother many times. (drug user, thief) SD was traumatized. She was with us one night when the cops came to a neighbors house. Just the lights flashing through the blinds caused her to have a screaming fit!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:01 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • There a high probability that when you go to court - they will already know there is a warrant out for her arrest. The best place to contact is the state attorney at the courthouse where the hearing is. She can be taken into custody right at the courthouse.
    PrttyMstng

    Answer by PrttyMstng at 11:10 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

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