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is this greedy

when we got engaged and married..never had an engagement ring...ive said many times that i still want an engagement ring and someting romantic to go along with it. when we got engaged...we were standing outside while he was on break from staff duty in the army an di had the weekend off...we said it under the stars and it was the first time he told me he was in love with me...but t heir was no one knee or even really asking me..he sorta told me and i went with it cause i wanted it way before he mentioned it...i dont want a fancy 5000 ring. but something..something small. we have wedding rings i just for whatever reason really want an engagement ring with something really romantic behind it. our wedding was nothing special. we had to rush cause he was deploying and we plan to have a bigger one..i sorta want a romantic "proposal"of getting married again with a ring caues i love romance but i dont want to be greedy.

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Asked by moki1984 at 9:09 AM on Mar. 20, 2009 in Relationships

Level 11 (573 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • too add. financially if he wanted to get me a ring it is possible. probably on a payment plan not outright cash unless he saved...but its very feasible if he wanted to d oit....but he never thinks about it. as many hints as ive dropped and ive talked about it.....i bet if youa sked him today what i want the most as a "gift" he wouldnt know which is annoying

    Answer by moki1984 at 9:10 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • after reading this...we did not get married cause he was deploying, it sorta reads like that. it just happened that while planning to get married his new orders were cut and we had a very short amount of time before he left and i was getting out of the army so it got rushed

    Answer by moki1984 at 9:11 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • I don't think you are greedy. I think most woman picture their proposal a certain fairy tale way and it sounds like you are a bit disappointed with it. I would approach the subject with him and see what he says. Be blunt, guys don't take hints very well. And if he doesn't love the idea then start socking away a littl here and there and get it for yourself as a gift!

    Answer by kboney29 at 9:18 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • why do you need all of that if you are already married? i understand the fairy tale part but seriously. instead of wasting that money on all of that, go on a nice trip or something. maybe instead of a ring maybe a necklace with an inscribed locket. it is something that he should come up with other wise it doesnt come from his heart and therefore loses the romance. JMO

    Answer by crazy_mum at 9:22 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • he wont get me an inscribed locket or anything like that. he wont save to buy me anything big like that...not because he's a dick or anything but he just doesnt think to do things like that.
    ultimately i wont get anything unless i buy it or i push for it.

    and..i dont get any romance unless i initiate it...i set up our wedding, i set up our honeymoon, anniversaires etc. he's a very manly man...and the one thin gi always wanted was a heartfelt proposal and a ring to remind me of it. i know he loves me but it would be nice to have that symbol on my finger. and that effort from him

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:28 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • oops i hit anon

    Answer by moki1984 at 9:28 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • I can see if you want something romantic and special but it sounds like you married a guy who isn't in to all that. My SO is military and if I get him to hold my hand I think that's something big! lol I'm guessing your dh wants to make you happy in life. That sounds terribly romantic to me. Perhaps he has no clue how to be romantic other than spending the rest of his life trying to make you queen of his world. A material thing to wear can't match that.

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:50 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • You're already married, already have a child, and you still want an engagement ring with a proposal? Nahhhhhh that's not selfish or greedy.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:51 AM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • I think the proposal is a little unrealistic since you are already married. But I can understand wanting the engagement ring. I think you should find the one you want, save up for it, and then when it's getting close to your anniversary tell him, this is what I want, here is the money for you to buy it for me. Unless you think you can get him to save for it, then just tell him which one you want. I picked out my ring and personally I prefer it that way because then I was able to get exactly what I wanted and not some style that wasn't me. I have to say a lot, if not most proposals aren't this fairy tale super romantic thing that Hollywood portrays. They might be somewhat romantic, but they aren't nearly as wonderful as in the movies. I don't even remember how my husband broached the topic and we ended up looking at and buying my ring. I knew when he picked it up and we went out to a fancy place for dinner and he CONT

    Answer by Christina807 at 12:51 PM on Mar. 20, 2009

  • and he officially asked me while we were out to dinner, but it wasn't like I didn't know it was coming or he did something creative like putting the ring in a rose or whatever. He just pulled it out and asked me and he knew I was going to say yes since he had really asked me earlier when we went looking at rings.

    Answer by Christina807 at 12:54 PM on Mar. 20, 2009

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