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Should I break up with him?

Get ready this is pretty sad. My boyfriend asked me the other night if he could sleep with other girls but still come home to me. We have been together for 3 1/2 years and we have a 2 year old. He says he doesn't want to get married but I am the only one he will ever love, he just wants to "hit it and quit it" with other girls. Then he said that he will be very unhappy if he is 50 and I have been the only one he has slept with. He is 22 and I am 21. I don't know how to react, cuz I don't want a break up to effect my son but I don't want to turn a blind eye while he screws other females. Will he change, maybe conseling, or should I just walk away and we can figure out a schedule for our son?

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Asked by Anonymous at 5:53 PM on Mar. 21, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (15)
  • I would just walk away. It sounds like he isn't ready to settle down yet. Maybe someday, but definitely not now.

    Answer by lilbit837 at 5:55 PM on Mar. 21, 2009

  • He is what he is, you can't change him. Even if he doesn't do that, because he said it to you, you'll always be wondering. Torturing yourself with those thoughts. And if he does do it, and you don't do anything about it, what are you teaching your child?

    Answer by EireLass at 5:58 PM on Mar. 21, 2009

  • he sounds like an ass. if he really loved you he wouldnt need any other girl. he wont change unless he wants to and he obviously doesnt. counseling would probly only work for a small amount of time. after that he may just end up doing it to you and lieing about it. there are many bad consequenses of him sleeping with other women with the "hit it and quit it" mind set. you and him couls end up with an std or std and be very miserable, not only that you could get hpv or cervical cancer. even if a girl doesnt hav symptom or just doesnt check, he can be a carrier if he sleeps with someone hu has it. even if he uses a condom its still a risk because most stds can slip through the microscopic holes in condoms. i wouldnt risk it. sit him down and tell him how you feel. if he doesnt like it then maybe he just doesnt love you like he says he does. if he truely loves you he will understand and respect how you feel.

    Answer by xhellxfirex495 at 6:01 PM on Mar. 21, 2009

  • sti**

    Answer by xhellxfirex495 at 6:02 PM on Mar. 21, 2009

  • I would def. break up with him. If he really loved you he would not want to go sleep with other women. That's just how love works, you don't want anyone else. I realize you don't want to break up because of your son but unfortunately staying in a loveless unhealthy relationship is possibly even worse for your son than leaving the man all together. I would give this guy space to be immature and to realize what he lost and then maybe consider getting back with him at a later date. And also, no you will not be able to change him, and if he does change, it will take time and he is the only one who can change himself...not anyone else.

    Answer by Ash9724 at 6:03 PM on Mar. 21, 2009

  • Walk Away Now! do not wait to have more kids and waste your youth on this guy who does not respect you or his son. He will never change.

    Answer by gammie at 6:03 PM on Mar. 21, 2009

  • sorry. i dont mean to be a downer...but ive been thru the same thing. only differnce is he wantd me to join...i was lik fuck no ewwww. im straighter than a board and he knew that he just wanted to sleep with other girls without gettin in trouble. i hope it works for the best for you and eire is right...its not a good thing to teach your child that stuff lik that is ok because later on it could end up with something serious. sit down and talk. think it thru and do wuts best for you and your child.
    wish you all the best.

    Answer by xhellxfirex495 at 6:05 PM on Mar. 21, 2009

  • Chances are, hes already out there doing it behind your back anyways. I'm sorry. Maybe you should just break up with him. YOur child will get through it. There are plenty of people that have made it through it. Just stay strong. And a real mad could be with one women, the women he loves, and be just fine with that. Your bf is an asshole

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:09 PM on Mar. 21, 2009

  • Oh Hunny, I think in your heart you already know what to do. You are are still so young and have your whole life ahead of you. The right man will come along and will appreciate you and love your child. Sorry, but...SCREW THAT LOSER!

    Answer by Peggy1984 at 6:11 PM on Mar. 21, 2009

  • I'm going to sound like the devil's but in his defense (if there is any lol) he did tell you/ asked you, otherwise if he really was an ass he would have JUST DONE IT. Besides, he is young and might be feeling he is missing out, and deep down you might just feel the same way. I know both my husband and i did too 10 years ago.

    Now back to you, if you dont want to let him (which some people do in open marriages, threesomes, whatever) then just say no and walk away. He is asking, now is up to you to know what you want.

    Answer by krubalc at 6:11 PM on Mar. 21, 2009

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