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Do you think it is wrong for a commited couple to give up their unborn for adoption?

My husband and I have a 1 year old daughter together. We mutually had decided recently that we didn't want to have another child. We love our daughter dearly and feel that she's all and more then we could ask for. We want to always be able to provide everything she needs and more through out her whole life.. even when we are gone. We have our own home, jobs, vehicle, and we're living a happy life. We've been on birthcontrol, and it failed us. Now I am 1 month pregnant, and we're not happy about it. We don't believe in abortion, so adoption is what we have in mind.. I just feel so guilty about it... Is it wrong for us to give our child up for adoption because he/she wasn't planned, and sadly to say, not wanted.. I know how selfish this is... but we truly feel it would be best for the baby to have other parents. I will definetly get a permanent birth control after this.

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Asked by Anonymous at 7:07 PM on Mar. 21, 2009 in Adoption

Answers (91)
  • No, it's far better to give her up then to not want her.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:08 PM on Mar. 21, 2009

  • no its not wrong... its the right thing to do if you dont think you are ready for it. props to you for not even considering abortion... good job!! :)

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:08 PM on Mar. 21, 2009

  • I dont think it is a bad decision at all, at least you are giving this baby life and not aborting him/her and someone who wants a child and cant have one will be able to do that! I thank you!

    Answer by ProudMomma9-08 at 7:10 PM on Mar. 21, 2009

  • ohh tough question girl! if it was me i wouldnt give the baby up but thats me! no bashing! if you feel that you cant take care or want the baby give the baby up if its how you feel

    Answer by 4lyfe56 at 7:11 PM on Mar. 21, 2009

  • I think you'll probably regret it after you do it. What about when you see your baby on an ultrasound but already promised him/her to someone else? What about when you have your baby and even though he/she is just as beautiful as your first.. you have to hang him/her over to the babies new parents. I can't say it's a terrible thing, because you'll be blessing a family with something they couldn't do on their own... but still, what if you regret? You had better be COMLETELY sure this is what you want.. And you should probably wait until you get a bit farther along to see if you do happen to get attached.. Feel the baby move. See the baby's ultrasounds.. listen to the baby's heartbeat. Accidents are miracles too.

    Answer by MJ_BN_FE at 7:12 PM on Mar. 21, 2009

  • I think that all things happen for a reason. This child may be intended as a blessing for you or for someone else. If you really feel that you will resent a child that was unplanned, then I believe it would be better to adopt out. There are no right or wrong circumstances for an adoption, only what is right for that couple and that child. Good luck with your decision.

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 7:17 PM on Mar. 21, 2009

  • We've just started our home study to adopt, we have one child but are unable to have more, so I'm sure your baby will be a wonderful blessing to a loving family! It is an amazing choice you have made, I wish more mothers would choose adoption over abortion! Your daughter sounds like a very lucky little girl to have parents that care so much for her, she sounds very loved! I'm sure the family you pick to adopt this little one will love him/her as much as you love your daughter, I feel you are making a very wise decision! I hope all works out for you and your little one, your family will be in my prayers!

    Answer by Christian-Mom79 at 7:24 PM on Mar. 21, 2009

  • if you dont WANT the baby then dont keep him or her, its not good to bring a child into a situation like that. but if you are already feeling guilty maybe you should rethink somethings and talk more with your husband about it. i dont want to sound mean so sorry if i did, but i personally think that if youre feeling guilty then...ya know?

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:42 PM on Mar. 21, 2009

  • The farther along you get the more hard its going to become,it took me and my husband 16 LONG years to have our son. I wanted kids right away and so did he and we never used anything to prevent it. We thought we would be childless forever,when I was diagnosed a diabetic I was pregnant ever 7 months,of course we lost 3 unborns but we kept trying and it finally thru the grace of God we had a healthy boy. I believe children is a gift a privalidge and I hope you do what is best all around, I am no ones judge so I will pray for you and your family that you both make the best choice,please keep in touch thru this and let us lnow how this is all going,God Bless.

    Answer by momindistress08 at 8:03 PM on Mar. 21, 2009

  • I'm not in your shoes I think it's sad though :( But at least it's not abortion.

    Answer by prettymama0607 at 8:50 PM on Mar. 21, 2009

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