Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

posting it here...its really bothering me!! help!!

ok so long story short, i was a mess in high school. cut class, smoked weed, blah blah blah. my dad was abusive so when moved out when i turned 18 and as a result, didnt finish school. got my ged, took some college classes, moved in with bf, got pregnant, had baby, got married, taking more classes, working, not acting like an idiot anymore, obviously! my sister took a more traditional approach...finished high school, went to college (which my parents paid for, i'm getting myself through) she also drinks, parties, all the time, and has had an abortion. well, my grandmother just thinks she is wonderful and acts like i'm horrible bc i had a baby before i got married. nevermind that hubby and i are married now and things are great. oh no. i'm the devil incarnate and my sister is a saint! i even got so fed up that in a fit of immaturity yelled, "well, cecil had an abortion freshman year!" and my grandmother called me a liar!! help!


Asked by Anonymous at 1:38 AM on Mar. 23, 2009 in Adult Children (18+)

This question is closed.
Answers (22)
  • Live your life and forget about hers. I think Grandmas always have a favorite that they use bllinders on. But you trying to make them realize that shes not who they think she is always seems to backfire! Be proud of what you've accomplished. You dont need a pat on the back from them!! Heres one from me(pat pat pat) and give your self a break girl, pat yourself once in a while.

    Answer by DIANE463 at 11:10 AM on Mar. 31, 2009

  • Does it really matter what your sister does? I mean if your happy with your life than stick to it. I guess I'm the girl in the family that's like your sister. I know at least one of my brother's resents me because of the way my family treats me. But he's still my brother, and I try to get along with him the best I can.

    Answer by sarapurser at 1:41 AM on Mar. 23, 2009

  • my sister doesnt try to get along with me. in fact, if theres any heat brought on her she brings up something i did years ago.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:42 AM on Mar. 23, 2009

  • Than piss on her. I mean let her live her life. She'll fuck up eventually and your family will realize who she really is. I'm sure your family loves you, just as much as they love her.

    Answer by sarapurser at 1:43 AM on Mar. 23, 2009

  • i get that they love me but i just wish they would let go of all of it. and my grandmother is out of her mind. i mean, seriously. calling me a liar? she even went as far as to say that i probably had an abortion and was trying to blame it on cecil.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:46 AM on Mar. 23, 2009

  • Than don't talk to her. I mean how old are you? And your letting this pettiness get to you ?

    Answer by sarapurser at 1:47 AM on Mar. 23, 2009

  • I know what you mean. I got pregnant right out of high school, and my parents were just so disappointed with me. My two older brothers are SLUTS! One was in college and the other in law school, they are both still heavy drinkers, partiers, and definitely sleep around, and I only had sex FIVE times over the course of a year, and I got pregnant! I wanted so bad to tattle. Now, three and a half years later, I'm glad I didn't, now I'm married, my parents adore my daughter, and I didn't strain my relationship with my brothers.

    You might need to just tell your family members that you have made mistakes in the past, but have gotten your life together, and you are working hard to get yourself through college and raise your daughter. Tell them you are sure that your sister, and even your grandmother has made mistakes in the past, and that maybe they need to give you a break.

    Answer by toriandgrace at 1:47 AM on Mar. 23, 2009

  • i know how you feel. i wasnt married when i got pregnant, im a fulltime student and will be starting grad school in january. my sister is a lot like yours except shes not in school. my family thinks that she is perfect because i have a child and she doesnt. basically i told them they are welcome to be part of me and my sons lives but im not going to come around for them to treat me like crap. (i was nicer than that when i said it though) its helped for the most part. occassionally i still get snide remarks from my grandma but things are better.

    Answer by Chandra034 at 1:53 AM on Mar. 23, 2009

  • Let it go.Life is too short. You have your own family,you arent competing with your sister for your parents approval anymore,are you? Let it go,enjoy your life and be happy with your accomplishments.

    Answer by guardmp_MOM at 6:01 AM on Mar. 23, 2009

  • gosh I had a grandmother like that who was in such denial over my cousin who was 4 months younger than me. I did all the right things, followed all the rules, didn't smoke or drink or do drugs. cousin did all of that and more not to mention basically abandoned her kid and then moved in with some high class drug dealer (I guess it's ok to sell drugs to rich folks in my grandmother's eyes as long as you live in a big fancy house and have money). Meanwhile I put myself through college and reared 3 kids and bought my own house (small but adequate). When my gmother died she was still praising the drug addict/dealer cousin and said she should have been my dad's daughter!!!!! My dad would never had stood for the cousin's nonsense. At one time cousin said my dad "made her sell drugs" bc he wouldn't give her money! LOL Just be proud of who you are. You know you are made of what counts in life. that's all that matters.

    Answer by admckenzie at 6:42 PM on Mar. 23, 2009