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Does this ever happen to you?

My 4 year old for the last 3 weeks have been giving me more attitude than he has ever. He's constantly telling me no I'm not going to do this or that. He's constantly telling me what to do. I have been putting him in time out more times than I can count these days. Any suggestions on what to do? It's exhausting to keep at this. Does this happen to anyone else?

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aidansmom111804

Asked by aidansmom111804 at 9:43 PM on Mar. 23, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 2 (7 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • Now is a good time to teach him boundaries. He needs to know the word "no" needs to be respected. You start by respecting his "no". He learns this way to respect your "no". Keep encouraging him, and loving on him when he MUST go to bed/eat/get ready to go. But if he says "no", try again a few minutes later. He must know that he can be loved for a "no" as well as "yes", then he will mimic that behaviour. If he "acts out", calmly reassure him that while he can act out, it helps nothing. You can't control another's actions, but you can control your own. When he tells you what to do, help him understand this. Let him know that he can "talk", but it doesn't make mommy/daddy "do". Polite words and pleasing voices are appealing. It's helpful. But by example is how we all learn. Save the discipline for when he does something truly deserving, like abusing someone, or blatant destruction, etc.
    Ophy

    Answer by Ophy at 10:26 PM on Mar. 23, 2009

  • Yep.. he is testing his limits. this is actually a good thing. But you need to stand firm and be consistant. Yes it is exausting, but it wont' last forever. Be firm, and discipline with purpose. Figure out the heart of the behavior.... which sounds to me is just plain old.. power struggle. Don't worry, if your consistant and nip this in the butt now... then it won't be a forever issue.
    daughteroftruth

    Answer by daughteroftruth at 10:37 PM on Mar. 23, 2009

  • Just wanted to let you know you are not alone. I am going through the same thing with my 4 year old. He went from being this sweet little boy who wanted to help me with everything to a kid with an attitude who back talks to me all the time.

    joleensboys

    Answer by joleensboys at 8:17 AM on Mar. 24, 2009

  • You are not alone and although so tired of the time out thing stick to your guns. Welcome to the Mammahood! It is a childs job to push the envelope and our job to set the boundries. They will do this throughout childhood and the issues will get bigger as they do. If you keep them in check at all times it will minimize your troubles down the road. He/she needs to know that bossing you around is unacceptable and you will crack down on her for it every time. They can hold out for what seems like forever but trust me if you keep on them they will eventually learn that you mean business. Just know this is normal, what is not normal is letting it slide because then you get a mouthy ugly child no one wants to be around and possibly a discipline problem in school and later in life.
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 10:16 AM on Mar. 24, 2009

  • wow i am so in the boat with you my 5 year old daughter and my 3 year old son are both on this i am the boss trip it is making me crazy i cant stand the back talking and the just flat out not minding anyhting anyone says... if you figure out how to make it stop please let me know i am in need of some advice
    Kisses0113

    Answer by Kisses0113 at 11:36 AM on Mar. 28, 2009

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