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I have a very emotional 11 yo girl. Any suggestions how to deal with her anxiety?

School is stressful. She doesn't have many friends at school and considers herself at the bottom of the "chain". Dealing and coping with her period at school is stressful. She is an only child.

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Asked by Anonymous at 12:42 PM on Mar. 24, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

Answers (6)
  • Maybe have her see a counselor. Sometimes teens just need to talk about things, ya know, get stuff out that is hard to talk to your parent about. She also could just be overwhelmed w/ the new load of hormones, does she have any hobbies? Or anything to keep her busy? Studies show that teens who keep busy w/ activities are less likely to have any kind of behavior problems (not suggesting she has any by no means) There minds are occupied w/ things they enjoy, and are less likely to worry about small stuff. It will also help her build strong relationships with other kids who enjoy a similar activity as she does. GOOD LUCK!!!


    Answer by samurai_chica at 12:54 PM on Mar. 24, 2009

  • I think I was the same way when I was younger. I had personal reasons for a lot of it, but if she finds even just one othe person to connect with. She will start to pull out of it. Our school had the accelerated reader program, and I dove head first into it. Came out with a lot more confidence than I ever thought. I got to meet lots of other kids my age who liked reading, seeing movies, etc. Even more so when I won top points leader for our school, then our whole district. Got put in the paper and When I got to high school I met a few new friends, and began to open up and learn to just be me. Granted I surprised the hell our of everyone when I enlisted in the Marine Corps after some college. But I found myself challenging myself to make myself lots of sorry. I hope she is able to be more comfortable just being herself!!

    Answer by MSully3 at 2:47 PM on Mar. 24, 2009

  • Have her see a counselor. Encourage her to try new things, join new groups. Invite her friends over to do things. I have never had a lot of friends but the friends that I have are great friends and we do as much as we can together. My son has few friends that he does things with outside of school, so I signed him up for baseball for the last 5 or 6 years. He has no choice in this one activity because it was "prescribed" by his doctor and me so he has socialization with kids his age. It has really helped. When my son gets anxious, it is hard to get him to calm down. He usually cries uncontrollably. He ahs seen a counsleor and that has helped. I talk to him, talk to the friends I am comfortable with to just hang out with Ty and keep him happy, make sure he is ok. To tell his teacher if he seems sad. A counselor will help her make new friends too.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 3:17 PM on Mar. 24, 2009

  • School is hard at that age for girls, my daughter is having trouble too. Girls that age are mean and can make life for some girls miserable. I would try to find a way to help her make friends with the same interests as her, maybe an activity at school or a dance class outside of school anything that helps her to make more friends and getting involved in an activity seems to get girls to work together as a group and there is less singling out of only one child. Good luck and keep being there for your daughter.

    Answer by nannabart at 1:43 AM on Mar. 29, 2009

  • I just had an idea that worked for my daughter, Talk to someone at your school about getting her a big sister at school. A nice teenager that would kind of take her under her wing and help her out at school and be there for her at school. My daughter befriended a older teenager and just because of her friendship with this older girl the girls in her class seem to be nicer to her and thought it was cool and it helped her to make more friends. Just a suggestion.

    Answer by nannabart at 1:48 AM on Mar. 29, 2009

  • Poor thing! That's part of growing up sadly =(. Just be there for her. Maybe she can join some school clubs. But if she isn't interested with the kids at school, you could try sending her to a summer camp or a workshop for a hobby of hers. If she really isn't holding up with the period, maybe just let her go home once in awhile for a surprise! I think it would make her smile. Just tell her that the "popular" girls aren't better than her and tht she's probably going t be a better person than them in the long run so she can't possibly be on the bottom of the chain!

    Answer by pizagirl543 at 2:48 PM on Mar. 29, 2009

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