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How do I "re-train" my children not to be so mouthy?

I don't know where my husband and I went so wrong, but our children ages 8 and 9 have gotten so mouthy and snotty towards us. I just can't take it any more. I need some help or some ideas with what might work on getting back into control.
What works as a punishment for being mouthy?

I knew better than to be mouthy or backtalk my parents, we just knew better growing up that that is not what we were supposed to do. Where did I go so wrong and how do I fix it>?

 
cuteasabutton78

Asked by cuteasabutton78 at 2:28 PM on Mar. 24, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 8 (240 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • You need to sit down with your kids and your husband and have a discussion on their behavior. Have a set of rules you and your husband agreed on, let them know what the rules are and what the consequences will be if they break the rules. Then stick with it and don't back down. Example is if they mouth off they lose all tv privledges for that day, if they do it again in the same day they lose the next day too. Of if they play video games or such take them away. Whatever rules and consequences you set the important thing is you stick to them and never back down.
    nannabart

    Answer by nannabart at 1:32 AM on Mar. 29, 2009

  • My son is only 7, so a big age difference but he started to get very disrespetctful at the begenning of the school year (I suspect it had to do with a group of friends but I will never know) and we just had to get really tough on him for a few weeks, he had to use his perfect manners ALL THE TIME, untill he couldnt stand it any more. Yes mam and no mam on everyting, he had notother option and if he didnt use them it was like he was invisible we didnt respond to him at all unless he did. He got the hint pretty quickly.
    AK_aries

    Answer by AK_aries at 3:02 PM on Mar. 24, 2009

  • I would first of all make sure that you and your husband are speaking respectfully to everyone including them so that they have a great example. Maybe they should be rewarded for respect rather than disciplined for disrespect. They will respond better to new rewards then to what would seem like a sudden attack on what was once okay.

    Praise them for being polite, correct them when they are rude, and start a rewards system.
    amber710

    Answer by amber710 at 3:08 PM on Mar. 24, 2009

  • IGNORE their talk. When my son talks like that to me, I ignore him or ask, "are you talking to me?" I will not respond until he talks nicely to me. I also watch how I talk to him or to other people, just to make sure I am not talking snotty and he heard me. I don't expect perfection but I do expect respect and politeness. Slip ups once in a while are ok. They are kids and have to learn and be taught how to act.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 3:10 PM on Mar. 24, 2009

  • When our 10 year old gets mouthy, she has to do pushups. We got this from Tae Kwon Do and have used it at home as well. If that doesn't work, she stands with her back against the wall, legs slightly out and knees bent to 90 degrees with her arms straight out. Another thing we got from TKD. Works for us. I have seen some very unrully, disrespectful kids come to TKD and after a couple weeks start to see an improvement in their attitude and behavior
    marbear98

    Answer by marbear98 at 9:12 PM on Mar. 24, 2009

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