Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

do i have every right to feel this way

My BF and I have been living together now for a year with my daughter during that time things were good till december things started getting down hill. I'm unemployed and I've been going to school I have been trying to get a job but its really hard I've been on 3 interviews so far. anyway my BF sometimes says mean and hurtful things to me and I have been putting up with it because I did love him this past weekend he said something to me that really hurt me a lot and he said that me and my daughter are a burden to him and that I'm costing him money and i do nothing for him. although the dogs are costing him more money than we are because i have been supporting myself and my daughter. and we don't ask nothing of him. on monday he apoligized for what he said he said he only said it because he knew it would hurt me and that he cont'd on bottom


Asked by Anonymous at 2:51 PM on Mar. 25, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • Yes, you have every right to feel that way and I think you are being smart about your decisions. Many men may say they don't want YOU to go, but what they really mean is that they don't want to be alone or they don't want you to go b/c then they have to do all the things you have been doing for him. Sometimes we can miss the IDEA of a person more than the actual individual themselves. Make sense? You are doing the right thing. Good Luck!

    Answer by ozarkgirl3 at 2:58 PM on Mar. 25, 2009

  • That is so rude. He may be feeling financially stressed so he is taking it out on you. Hes lucky he isnt having to pay child support.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:54 PM on Mar. 25, 2009

  • cont'd was upset to come home and see a mess that the dogs did and that he a little too drink and that i wasn't home yet. I was out with my sis and my bro in law and my daughter I haven't gone to a party since New year's eve. anyway even though we talked I still don't feel correct and ever since that nothing has changed he comes home and acts as if i'm not even here he goes to bed and that's all he has been doing for the past two nights. My idea is as soon as i get a job and get back on my feet i'm out. He doesn't even call me like before nor does he text me he doesn't even tell me when he is working late or not like he used to he just shows up as if he is trying to catch me. whenever I tell him that we are leaving is when he starts to say sorry don't leave i don't want you guys to leave I do care and love you guys. I can't do this anymore

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:54 PM on Mar. 25, 2009

  • Your BF sounds like a dime a dozen.
    Your feeling are your feeling...and they are valid..
    I like your idea about getting back on your feet and getting out.
    He is inconsiderate of you, he talks to you with no respect, and how many times does he come
    home drunk.
    Come on you can do better than that withouth even trying..
    He rules the roost and I think soon you should fly away..

    Answer by Dannee at 2:56 PM on Mar. 25, 2009

  • Don't do it anymore. You don't deserve that. He has no right treating you that way. It sounds to me like he just doesn't know what he wants. So you have to do what YOU want, what's best for you and your daughter. Is he your daughters dad?

    Answer by Buffie95 at 2:57 PM on Mar. 25, 2009

  • I wouldn't deal with his shit anymore. I wuld up n leave if I were you. I had a boyfriend that couldn't keep a job and I kicked him out.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:58 PM on Mar. 25, 2009

  • yeah that should show you just how much he truly loves you. no matter how bad things get he should never intentionally hurt you. he doesn't love you. i don't work and my husband doesn't say crap like that. he understands that after the job search and nothing then us starting a family and me becoming a stay at home mom is better. since i couldn't find a job. it's hard times and your bf should understand and just get over it.

    Answer by melody77 at 3:06 PM on Mar. 25, 2009

  • I would leave. Even just for a few days. Tell him that he needs to change and he needs to prove it before you will come back. That is NOT something to say to someone you love. My fiancee use to be like that, but once I showed him that it REALLY hurt me, and that I was serious about how I felt, he got more serious too. Good luck. Let me know how it goes =]

    Answer by mommykayti at 3:06 PM on Mar. 25, 2009

  • Sit down and explain that in ths economy, it's really easy to get frustrated and take things out on each other, but that it's not cool and you're not going to put up with it IF he makes it a habit, as in if he does it again, you're calling him on that crap.

    Answer by Fistandantalus at 3:28 PM on Mar. 25, 2009

  • he prob feels financially burden ....and his love language most likely is acts of service...and so in his are not doiing your part. right? no but that is prob what is goin on in his head

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:51 PM on Mar. 25, 2009