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Has anyone gone through marriage counciling?

I won't ask you to divulge your intimate details that landed you there. But if you could say maybe on a scale of 1-10 (10 being the worst) how bad your marriage problems where and then if the counciling did any good. Did you feel it was something you could have handled on your own...maybe google marriage enhancing activities to try. Or is the sound advice of a professional the only option.



If there is any anon that feels like they wanna say something hateful to me, I ask that at least in this thread you refrain. This is something that I am very upset about and am desperate to fix our marriage. I am without question the cause of the problems....but I love my husband and while I might not deserve him I want to do whatever...WHATEVER it takes to make him know that. And I want to become a better person, the type of wife HE deserves.

 
munch12502

Asked by munch12502 at 4:14 PM on Mar. 25, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (3 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • I think it is worth a shot. Try everything before giving up on your marriage.
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 4:23 PM on Mar. 25, 2009

  • Scale rating = 10 Did Marriage C help? No. Did we try to work it out on our own. Yes? Result? Divorce
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:18 PM on Mar. 25, 2009

  • My parents marriage were at an all time worst. fighting, screaming, arguing, affair, fighting, fighting, fighting, misery, fighting, I'd say it was a 9, because there was no physical abuse, but everything else was there. It was terrible, terrrriiibbbllllleeee. They went through marriage counseling, he was a christian counselor, which I believe does make a difference because I truely believe that you can not fully love someone else without know God's undying(unforgiving, *unconditional is the word i was looking for) LOVE. After a few months of counseling, they were SO much better. My dad still has a temper here and there, but their marriage went from a nine to i'd rate a 2. (there's always room for improvement!) I've heard WONDERS of the movie fireproof too. I'd suggest buying that and giving that a whirl. If you need to talk Shannon you can PM me anytime! You know i'm always on :) (just about) hehe
    lonelymom911

    Answer by lonelymom911 at 4:22 PM on Mar. 25, 2009

  • Oh so sorry youre having such a hard time. No, I have never been to marriage counseling. I have done some individual counseling when I was younger and having some anxiety issues. If your willing to do whatever and hes willing to do whatever, then you have a good shot. I would try going to someone on a referral. Don't just look in the phonebook or anything. The key is changing the destructive behavior and getting to the root of WHY you (and him) do things to hurt one another. I know you think your all to blame, but I think that he has to have some responsibility in this, even if its just his lack of response. Good luck to you.
    momofsaee

    Answer by momofsaee at 4:24 PM on Mar. 25, 2009

  • Ok well he says no to marriage counciling??? Now what?
    munch12502

    Answer by munch12502 at 4:51 PM on Mar. 25, 2009

  • ours was a high 10 and marriage counseling was the only thing we had left. we went to a chrisitan counselor and it was the best thing we couldve done. the person who mentioned FIREPROOF is so right. that movie is definitly one to own (we do) and the book 'The Love Dare' from the movie. You said you were the problem (which you may be a big part of it but always remember 'your reactions come from a previous action' I ask myself all the time 'which of my actions has caused this reaction?' to help process. If he won't go to counseling then go by yourself. it still benefits & hopefully he will see the positive change in you & want to go. if not at least you are trying to do the best you can.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:16 PM on Mar. 25, 2009

  • Maybe try going to counceling yourself! fix you and then fix your marriage!! I belive that you should do everything that you can to save your relationship if you care about it before you give up on it!! good luck!!
    scaredmommy08

    Answer by scaredmommy08 at 5:49 PM on Mar. 25, 2009