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me and my husband have a 13 month old daughter and i just stay so tired these days going to class then coming home taking care of her and cleaning and cooking supper and then when i take a shower at night i just want to go to sleep...but my husband wants to have sex. but i dont get turned on like i use to we dont fight or any thing about he just says ok and goes to sleep. and then other days i just want to tear him up..and then it goes back to not wanting to do any thing again what up with me and do yuns have any advice for me?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:47 PM on Mar. 26, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • Try taking a shower in the morning as the water makes you more sleepy at night try to change your routen it might help.

    Answer by cruicky at 12:54 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • I think normal sex lives have ups and downs. You are going through a down right now but it's to be expected because you have a lot on your plate. It will get better because things change over time.


    Answer by legalmommy101 at 12:54 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • Been there and done that. I feel for ya honey. i was the same exact way. It seemed like whenever i wanted to have sex he was gone and when he wanted to all i wanted to do was sleep. I am sure he got frustrated. i have a lot of bj's back then to compensate, I know it's not the same thing but it would tide him over till I was ready. It's just a universal mommy thing I think. We did also try to have more sex on the weekends too. My husband also used to tell me to call him at work and he'd run home for a "nooner" if i was in the mood and the baby was asleep. Things will get better once the baby is older. Good luck.

    Answer by GMR at 12:57 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • Yes. It's totally normal. This is how it will be until they go off to college! LOL!

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:58 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • make time for sex!!!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:59 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • Initiate sex...I just did on my Dh lunch break.

    Answer by mamaada at 1:08 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • I understand how you feel, you're burnt out and sex doesn't seem like a priority right now, but I also think it's important that you are sensitive to your husband's needs. Sex is a VERY important need for men. And even though it doesn't seem like it right now, you have sexual needs too. They're just buried there underneath all the stress. Talk to him and tell him how you've been feeling run down lately. See if he would be willing to help out a little more around the house and with your daughter to give you some extra energy for sex. Also, tell him what you would like him to do to help you get aroused. Perhaps a massage or taking a shower together would help? Men are usually responsive to helping and going the extra mile to please us if they realize they're going to get thier own needs met out of it. Good luck!

    Answer by moniquinha at 1:08 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • Its normal trust me. I am only 18 and I had the same problem with my now ex-boyfriend> I was always tired form working and coming home,cleaning, cooking dinner, and taking care of my daughter. It is very frustrating for them but what I did was jus told him to go play with himslef in the shower lol just so he'd quit buggin me. Then I guess that quit working after awhile. It is pretty normal though. Just try your best to make time for sex or you can even make certain days "sex days" lol like wednesday is hump day lol or you can even surprise him one day like get off work early and send the baby with a family member to babysit for a couple of hours and surprise him in laungrie and make it romantic. Hope everything works out for the both of you. Good Luck!

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:09 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • Very normal, but a man does have needs, so I suggest you pleasing him in other ways. Let him know you are tired, but you would like to make him happy.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:18 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • the man can handle himself, if I am not in the mood, sick, etc....

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:40 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

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