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what do u do if u and your partner are both in love with each other but u want to take it to the next level marraige but he says he has to get everything right and a place for just him me and the baby what should i do in my situation

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becky674

Asked by becky674 at 1:09 PM on Mar. 26, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (9)
  • Is he saying that yes he wants to get married to you, but he wants to do those things first??
    If he wants to get married and wants to do that stuff first then he seems to me to be a smart man.
    You two can still get engaged while all that is happening..
    Dannee

    Answer by Dannee at 1:11 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • just wait i guess. sounds like a great guy already! especially if he's willing to prepare and get everything ready/ just right for his future family.

    very responsible in my opinion.
    r.e.l.s.m.o.m.

    Answer by r.e.l.s.m.o.m. at 1:11 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • Well, do you see him actively doing things to get ready for that? And lets be clear, his ACTIONS not his words? If you do, great, if not? Read the book He's Just Not That Into You.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:16 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • Don't rush him! he just wants to feel like a man and get everything situated before he wants to get married. He sounds pretty responsible and organized though and Idk he may just surprise you one of these days but don't keep bringing it up to him or hint around to him cuz he could be scared too. Good luck and hopefully he'll pop the question soon.
    Native_Mommy253

    Answer by Native_Mommy253 at 1:18 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • He probably has no intention of marrying you. Why should he? He has everything he wants without the commitment of marriage. If you had asked me the question before you had a child, the answer would have been easy--leave now!! But the child makes all the difference, because children need two parents in order to be secure and well-adjusted in life. So now, you will have to decide what is the most important thing to you. There really is a reason why it is best to have the commitment of marriage before you have sex and bring children into the world. Every time that order is violated, troubles ensue. I'm sorry I don't have a magic potion to prescribe that would make your guy want to marry you and make a real family for your baby.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 1:22 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • I wouldn't give him an ultimatum, but would maybe sit down and see what sort of time frame he's thinking.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:22 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • The question is,,how long are you willing to wait for him to get his act together??Decide how long your willing to wait. If he has not changed by then ,,drop him and get on with your life.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 1:32 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • Well if it weren't for the baby being there already or on the way I would say he's being smart and responsible by thinking ahead. However, having the baby joins you two in a practical sense in ways that negate the "getting things in order" part. They are already out of order. Bash away but I'm not talking from a moral perspective, but from a logical perspective.

    You're both going to share the emotional and financial support of this child and you can do that a lot better together than apart.

    I would be weary by the "you can knock me up but not marry me" thing.
    Praying

    Answer by Praying at 1:50 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • Tell him to work harder, this nonsense (delay) isn't working for you. Ask him for a timeline (WHEN will it be the right time for him?) That way you can plan your wedding.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:01 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

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