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I know there are women on here who dont care what others think of them. Could someone tell me how to be that way?

I think I have an issue with other people and what they think of me. I worry that others are talking about me or think I am dumb. I hate feeling this way. I want to be confident and not care. But I cant get past it. What helps you to be this way?


Asked by Anonymous at 6:09 PM on Mar. 26, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • That worry comes from someone in your life (past or present) putting that thought into your head.

    EVERY DAY tell that little voice saying all those negative things about you in your head to shut up! Then repeat positive things about yourself. Repeat the process as necessary through out the day.

    If an outside voice is telling you these things, tell them to shut up too! Repeat above steps while punching said person in the junk! (LOL not really, but you get the idea behind this)

    Once you get into the habit of telling yourself positive things, eventually you won't have to do it on a consious will be the way you really feel about yourself!

    The only person that can change you opinion about YOU is YOU! Go for it!

    Answer by ozarkgirl3 at 8:18 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • Life is not life w/o confidence, its what makes you who you are. You should always be proud and confident in yourself. I learned early on that if you care what other girls think you will NEVER be happy, and i plan to be as happy as i possibly can in this one life I have been giving, so seriously, just be happy, forget all of the females who have something to say because those are the ones who are going to spend the rest of their life comparing themselves to others.

    Answer by Kbmancine at 6:12 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • one life i have ben GIVEN*** sorry, had to correct myself.

    Answer by Kbmancine at 6:13 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • For me it has just been getting older (almost 32) & realizing that life is too short to waste it on what other people think of me. Also becoming a mom & trying to raise my kids to be more confident than I was as a kid has been a big help to me.

    Answer by oahoah at 6:14 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • my dad always told me that when someone bothers you just smile and nod. as i got older i cahnged it to "smile and say f$#k em" not out loud of course. who cares what anybody else thinks. I know it won't help on here but it helps me from telling someone to f$#k off.
    if theyre talking about you, then they have a problem not you.

    Answer by casd at 6:27 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • I feel you. But I know where mine comes from--- my weight.. I weight 220. If i could get to just 150 I would feel like a new person & would shine more in life.
    Look into your life & see what you are not happy with? Maybe you need to eat healthier foods, maybe working out (not for weight loss, but well being) will make you feel better about yourself.
    Maybe find a good self help book is the way to go?
    What are you afraid to being judged for (im afraid of LOOKING (feel in blank)) so i know its my looks..
    If you feel you are "dumb" read up on some things that interest you! Get some knowledge behind you. And maybe you will feel better about yourself!

    Answer by MommaTasha1003 at 6:34 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • Read this book: "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle. It changed my life. I used to be completely hung up on what people were thinking about me and depressed. This book will help you to focus on the present, wonderful things that are going on in your life right now and to forget about the superficial things that don't really matter and affect your happiness. Of course, I still have my down days...I slip up and feel concerned with the negative opinions people may have of me every now and again, but falling and getting back up again is a part of life. That's the best advice I can give.

    Answer by moniquinha at 6:57 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • If you are talking about people on line it's very simple. See that little red X at the top right hand corner of your screen? Click it and poof all of this goes away. And what anyone says or thinks on here means nothing.

    If it's your insecurities about yourself in the real world then do something about it. If your being fat is the problem then lose some weight. Take a few classes on line if you're feeling dumb. People only have the power you give them. So give the power to yourself.

    Answer by Chrissy629 at 7:34 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • I normally screw their man... I may be dumb but I had what they had and their none the wiser... Lol... I am beautiful, smart and educated and have a good job. I've never been able to be friends with woman so instead I have taken what is theirs. They think they are high and mighty. I think they get what they deserve.... This bitch is taking their man, their money and their job.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:45 PM on Mar. 26, 2009

  • I learned that everyone is NOT going to like you no matter how hard you try so quit bothering. Make yourself happy and those that are able will be happy with you too. Those that won't be happy, screw 'em.

    Answer by krisr169 at 5:59 AM on Mar. 27, 2009