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Disrespectful?

I am tired of when I disciplian my kids my husband will pull said child into another room and bad mouth me! I walked in last night after tell my daughter for the hundred time to stop doing what she's doing. And if she continues she will pay for the damages to the house she is causing. So I go upstairs and come back down walk into the computer room behind my husband's back to hear him say you know your mom's bipolar (Ahh no I'm not) and she needs professional help so just ignore her. WTF! He says he was just trying to lighten the mood! At my expense? He says I'm being to beotchy with the kids and I hurt him. Hurt him? His dang name never came up in the conversation with my daughter. And no matter how mad I am at him I never pull the kids aside and says your dad's an ahole or this and that.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:11 AM on Mar. 27, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • This is disrespectful of your DH to do. I agree with you. When ever I disipline my kids, they usually go running to their father. But, he lets them know what they did wrong and why I get angry at them.
    Like, for example I tell my 9 year old to pick up his socks off the dining room floor 10x, he doesn't do it. I get mad, call him a pig. He gets upset, goes running to dad because I yelled at him. And my DH tells him "I don't want your socks on the dining floor either!"
    mamaada

    Answer by mamaada at 9:27 AM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • you should put your husband in his place
    michele101183

    Answer by michele101183 at 9:42 AM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • You & your husband need to sit down & discuss together how you should discipline your kids. You need to meet at a level where BOTH of you are comfortable. Otherwise, if you have different techniques your children will learn this to their benefit. It's very important that both of you use the same discipline technique. He has a right feel that your too harsh on them, he also has a right to feel the kids should be disciplined his way because he is the father. So, you guys need to find common ground on this issue. Talk about it.
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 9:50 AM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • This is not how to parent children. You both need to have a united force with the children..they shouldn't be able to "tell on mommy" to daddy. Tell your husband that he is doing more damage than good.
    NJMom2Tyler

    Answer by NJMom2Tyler at 9:54 AM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • oh heck no. I would not put up with that at all. Ask him if he would like to be the primary disciplinarian. I went through a similar situation, he kept saying oh you're too hard on her so I ok I give up you deal with it. Yeah that lasted a week. He did not like it at all. Mainly cause he was the mean dad and I was nice mommy. We did find a happy medium. Kids need their parents to be united front.
    lady-J-Rock

    Answer by lady-J-Rock at 10:00 AM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • He's trying to be the favorite parent. He knows you'll be the bad guy, while he takes the easy job of being the all-around-good-guy. I agree, ask him.. rather TELL him.. he gets to be the disciplinarian while you stand by and do nothing to help him. But that means you really have to do nothing. Let him learn his lesson.

    s.teph

    Answer by s.teph at 11:18 AM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • I guess he doesn't realize that....by disrespecting you, your kids will grow to hate him for that very reason. That is a big issue and not one that I suggest you putting up with for one day longer. Call around and find a couples therapist for the both of you. It might make a difference if someone else puts him in his place.

    legalmommy101

    Answer by legalmommy101 at 11:32 AM on Mar. 27, 2009

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