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Why are people so judgemental? I really don't understand. In my 24 years on this earth I have met so many people from so many different backrounds with different upbringings and beliefs. I don't feel anyone has the right to judge another (point one finger and there are three more pointing back at you).

Why are we as a human race so eager to condemn another for their choices? As long as a person is not physically/mentally abusing or neglecting their children, why does it matter? Who CARES if a person shops in their pjs? Who CARES if a mama is setting a certain example (eating poorly, wearing skanky clothes, etc) for her OWN children? It has nothing to do with you or me, so why are others so concerned with everyone else?

I have a lot to work on in my own life before I try to work on someone elses. Can you not honestly look in your mirror and say the same?


Asked by epoh at 11:03 AM on Mar. 27, 2009 in Just for Fun

Level 6 (146 Credits)
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Answers (13)
  • Why? I'll give my opinion as an Anthropologist...

    Self preservation. People learn by imitation. It is hard wired into our brains. This is how we learn which berries are poisonous etc. When you add language - human language - you get a unique combination of learning that is propelled by the ability to contemplate consequences of future events. A side effect of this is that we try to see way into the future - even after death. If we have the idea that we can control our destiny through contemplation of consequences, and human cognition provides us with the knowledge that we, and our offspring (which are an extension of our own self preservation) can and do learn by imitation, we will also try to control others behavior - with language, in an attempt to control our own destinies. When people get upset for being judged it's because, basically they are being told they won't survive.

    Answer by FlyMom07 at 1:12 PM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • this in a way is judgmental . everyone judges its human nature . but yes some are a bit beyond with it .

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:08 AM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • I love that saying about pointing a finger ...

    Answer by ZaTa at 11:10 AM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • I agree with the first poster. We all judge things and people everyday. Some people go to far with it, but we ALL do it. Any one who says they NEVER judge anyone is lying.

    Answer by abbynzachsmommy at 11:10 AM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • epoh, I agree with you, but you must remember we are on a question forum, if someone asks a question on a topic you will get lots of opinions and some of those opinion are going to be judgemental but not because one is wrong and the other right, it is because we are all diffirent and see things in a diffirent light. What one mom might do, I might not and if I give my experiance or opinion is that really being judgemental? People on the streets dont ask a stranger is this wrong, or what do you think. That is the diffrence.

    Answer by midnightmoma at 11:11 AM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • Thank you midnightmoma. I never looked at it from that point of view.

    I feel it is not judgemental to disagree with, say, the way another person is raising their child. But to condemn that mother and think she is a bad person for (formula feeding, breastfeeding, etc) IS being judgemental.

    I do not feel I was being judgemental of judgemental people when I posted this. I did not state they were "bad people" for being judgemental. I am trying to gain some insight into WHY people do this.

    Answer by epoh at 11:15 AM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • To be honest I didn't know people were this judgemental until I started coming here on Cafemom!! There is ALOT of angry, spiteful people on here! It gets soo annoying!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:16 AM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • lol its not just here. Its everywhere...

    Answer by babycakes254 at 11:19 AM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • I think there is a big difference between assessing something and judging. If you haven't visited the Religion & Beliefs I highly recommend it; there are people judging each other in there left & right. I don't think it's the same thing to state why you don't agree with something, & judging others who don't share your opinion. Yes, everyone judges to an extent but, when I say "judge" I mean when someone totally writes offs anothers beliefs or claims to know things they can't possibly actually know about a person (like "you are going to hell because you believe/think/do _____").


    Answer by BubbaLuva at 11:22 AM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • Are you talking about in here(cafemom)..Or in real life.On cafemom I think it's more about peoples opinions then judging.But every one judges.nobodies perfect.


    Answer by louise2 at 11:39 AM on Mar. 27, 2009