Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

don't want to do the cry it out method but it seems its the only thing left...HELP ME....

My son is almost 9 months old and he will not sleep in his crib all night. He starts out in his crib around 8 then he wakes up at 10:20 pm then at 12:15 am then at 2:30 am then usually around that time I'll put him in the bed with me and my husband. I don't mind I love him so much and I know that he just wants to be with me, but this makes it to where I don't really want him spending the night with my mom ever because I feel bad for him waking up. Not to mention he is the most rough sleeper he tosses, jerks, slap, and I wake up numerous times to a headbutt to the face. I can't sleep so that makes me more irritable throughout the day.What do I do!?! BTW he has had trouble with ear enfections he just got tubes yesterday. We've also tried the cry it out method numersous times and we fail miserably after about 5 hours of crying. (we checked on him every 5,10, and 15 min though)

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:24 PM on Mar. 27, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

Answers (12)
  • Crying it out does not work! It did not work for either of my kids. They are very well adjusted now and very independent. If they do not stay at GM house, so what. They will when they get older. It is only a problem when it is an issue to you. As for sleeping positions, move the crib next to your bed if you have room. Then you are sleeping together, but apart.

    Good luck and do what you feel is right, not what people tell you. Even what I said is only true if it feels right to you.

    Answer by MommyId at 1:29 PM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • well, I think first - my son had the same type of sleeping issues and i had to do the crying out method in the end - i did not want to do it either - BUT...even my Ped said because I was not being consistant enough in my efforts, he was unable to learn how to self sooth and put himself to sleep and it was only going to get worse If I didn't get him on some type of schedule - which ever one I decided to use though, I HAD To be consistant - I thought my son could cry for days - so I was afraid i was never going to sleep so I started it on a friday night - and decided to let him cry - he was NOT hungry when he was waking, he was not TOO wet, no medical issues at all so i was really doing him a favor by letting him LEARN to sleep - not making him cry without me - but you are letting him learn a very valuble tool he'll need forever -

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 1:31 PM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • I've never been one to let my child co-sleep with hub and I. Do you put him to bed awake, or asleep. If you put him to bed awake then that will help. Otherwise it takes consistancy, and it's not always a quick adjustment

    Answer by Zakysmommy at 1:32 PM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • CIO worked really well for me, my girls both found a way to fall back to sleep by themselves after crying for NO more then 5 min..... only had to do the method for about 3-4 days with both of them, after the 4th day they sleep very sound through the entire night.
    Try letting him sleep in his own bed and when he wakes up try to get him to go back to sleep...sing to him, or rub his head or back...whatever you do make sure you talk quietly and keep it dark.

    Answer by LimoMOM5 at 1:34 PM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • What do you think letting him cry is going to do? Make him happy and want to sleep alone? It doesn't happen like that. Babies aren't meant to sleep through the night. He's not doing anything wrong, so he shouldn't have to suffer for it. Just let him sleep with you and help soothe him at night. My daughter is a rough sleeper too. She's all over the place. But she's happy and secure. That's all that matters. CIO is not a fix all. It doesn't fix anything. It just hurts the child.

    Answer by jus1jess at 1:38 PM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • Actually babies are meant to sleep any way, some sleep through the night early on like mine, others are stubborn, others are products of their parents getting them anytime they make a noise

    Answer by Zakysmommy at 1:40 PM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • CIO worked with my 1st son but not my second. They have totally opposite personalities which is why it probably worked for one and not the other. My second son sounds like yours. He is almost 15 months old and still wakes up three, four times a night. When we did try CIO he just got so worked up that he would make himself throw up. That method is not for him. He does go to sleep now if I pat his back for a few minutes. Every time he wakes up I lay him back down and pat his back. It seems to mostly work. If he absolutely refuses to go back to sleep in his crib I lay with him on the couch. He doesn't seem to flop around as much there, because there is less space. I put him between me and the back of the couch. I figure if he gets older and just wants to sleep on the couch, fine. I didn't want to bring him to our bed because I am still trying to get his older brother out of our bed at night.

    Answer by JamieLK at 1:47 PM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • I hate cio! I agree with jus1jess completely. If anything buy the book the no cry sleep solution. Don't let him cry.

    Answer by calliesmommie at 2:22 PM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • I totally hear you...and feel your pain! My daughter is 8 months old and wakes up every hour to two hours. I think she slept better as an infant. (Ugh!) I don't believe in the cry it out method. When I feel frustrated, I try to think positive. One day she will be independent and won't want to be so close to me. Also, I've found that getting in and out of bed is harder than if I just put her to sleep with me from the get-go. (She sleeps in bed with us.) It allows me to assist her in falling back to sleep before she is wide-awake. Most people I know, that don't use the Cry-It-Out method, say their children started sleeping through the night at around 12 months. You've made it 9 months...what's 3 more? You'll have a more secure and independent child for it.

    Answer by EastOfTheWillow at 2:31 PM on Mar. 27, 2009

  • I just read in a magazine about the ferber method. they were interviewing him and he said himself (the person that supposedly invinted this method) that babies in the ages from 8-10 months usually have a seperation anxiety from there mother, and if they havent used the CIO method then it probably itsnt a good Idea to start just yet. So mabye that is a sign that i just need to continue doing what I'm doing. It doesn't bother me too much other than the lack of sleep, but thats why I'm a mother right? Hopefully we can just gradually get him in his crib. I also read that babies need alot less sleep than we think and he listed a chart so If anyones intersted message me and I'll send it to ya :)

    Answer by luvsgriffin at 2:37 PM on Mar. 27, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.