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my fiance broke up with me about a week ago. he says its just a break for a few weeks but i dont know if thats how its gonna end up. weve been together about 3 years and have a 2 year old. he says he doesnt love me but cares about me. he didnt tell me when i did something wrong or when something was upsetting him and he told me its because hes passive agressive and everything built up and he blew. but im not psychic i cant tell when i do something wrong without someone telling me. i want to give him space but im not sure what i should do. im really depressed and cant sleep or eat. every time he gets un happy it ends up like this...or he gets angry and yells or flips the mattress in our room. i cant look at him when i see him...i get more depressed and i fall in love with him but thatll lead to heart brake...what should i do...please no bashing. any advice?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:19 AM on Mar. 28, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • Just write it off and say goodbye. If you do end up married, chances are it won't be a happy one and/or it will end in a divorce. Better to just let it go now and have a chance at a happy home for the little one than stay in a potentially miserable relationship.

    Answer by jennijune_21 at 10:23 AM on Mar. 28, 2009

  • What she said.

    Answer by Fistandantalus at 10:26 AM on Mar. 28, 2009

  • Didn't we just answer this yesterday and you are asking it again? maybe you should figure it out on your own if you don't like our answers. The man says he doesn't love you. what more do you want?

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:27 AM on Mar. 28, 2009

  • Sounds like he needs to learn how to deal with his emotions. It' not healthy for you or your child to be around him until he is able to control himself. If he's willing ot fight for you (get the help he needs), then great. Wait for him. Otherwise, leave. But until things get better, you will still need psace.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:47 AM on Mar. 28, 2009

  • Move on or at least appear to. Don't hang on his every word or sit by the phone waiting for him to call. JMO

    Answer by hdb at 11:02 AM on Mar. 28, 2009

  • You have a child to consider. The man is obviously not for you otherwise he wouldn't be like this. You deserve much more happiness than this. I agree that you should move on and start a new life with your child.

    Answer by DaffodilFae at 11:12 AM on Mar. 28, 2009

  • honey, if a man breaks up with you thats it, a break? fuck a break, he said he loves you but not in love? well move on don't allow him to keep hurting you sounds like a coward, he wants you to let him off the hook by walking away he wants to run back and fourth and play with your emotions don't allow taht we all get depressed from time to time however we got more to live for then one man! atleast i no i do, i don't put a mans feelings before mine ever! and i think of my child first how can i take care of her or myself worried about a man, if he loves you and want to be with you , he will, you don't have to chase him, beg him, cry for him, and you can not change him. he don't want you he told you taht already i understand it hurts but come out of taht you got to get strong let him see you will be alright with out him, the more you hold, waite for his ass to come around the more he will look at you as WEAK!

    Answer by mememommie at 11:16 AM on Mar. 28, 2009

  • This girl is in love with this man yall. We know the best thing for her to do is leave him but we all know that love is blind. Girl i know your heart feels like knife just went through but hell this guy is not ready for commitment at all. I hate to say this but it sounds like {i said sounds like} hes taking you for a ride. Don't let no man pee in your eye and call it rain. When he does this you need to look him in the eye and tell him when he walks out that door he can't come back AND MEAN IT! A man will do only what you allow him to do. He knows you're going to keep letting him back in your life and hes going to keep doing it! Give yourself a makeover both inside and out and find you someone to treat you right girl. P.S. Its gonna get hard...but want don't kill you will only make you stronger.

    Answer by diamondmamma at 11:36 AM on Mar. 28, 2009

  • My Dh is like that. He acts all nice and says things don't bother him, then blows up about something small. Even though I didn't know I was upsetting him. I am still around because the relationship has good too. Also I stay for my daughter, but I don't know that I am making the right choice. He has broken up with you though, maybe that makes it easier. He made the decision for you. If you guys do get back together, just know that HE WILL NOT CHANGE. I have been with my hubby for 10 years now and am still not happy! If you do break-up, consider this... It will be easier on a 2yr old child than an older child. Good Luck. And you can do better.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:45 PM on Mar. 29, 2009

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