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Would this make you angry?!

My fiance's mom and stepdad last week made a verbal contract (he said no papers, we could just be honest and "man-up") for us to move in to an apartment on their property. We were going to help renovate -paint/replace carpets - pay affordable rent and utilities- and he said he was doing it to help us on our feet while still finishing school and me being due to have a baby in October.
I just found out he called my fiance last night and for no reason said This is how it's going to be You can't move in. That's final.
wtf! I'm so upset! I don't know if I can even go to school next semester! How much will I have to work? What did you girls do with your first kid, if you were tight on cash or time?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 3:23 PM on Mar. 30, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • With my first son... I graduated HS, Medical Assting course and got a job within the same month my 1st son was born. Luckily My dh and I found a small apt that was really resonable and my aunt took care of my son for a extremely cheap price.
    Good luck but I believe that you will be alright everything will work out. It always does.

    Answer by Mommy3b1g at 3:27 PM on Mar. 30, 2009

  • some times the school you go to(college) has child development classes and allow students to bring there children there,I know at the college I attended they allowed parents to drop children off as part of students to learn about children of different ages ,as far as the other issues that is a tough one .

    Answer by Lady58 at 3:28 PM on Mar. 30, 2009

  • It would make me angry but I would have never wanted to move into my moms or his moms apartment for help. Have you found out why they changed their mind? I was 18 with my first kid thankfully my then dh was in the airforce and we had free housing, ins and we both could attend college.

    Answer by okmommy08 at 3:28 PM on Mar. 30, 2009

  • I'm in college right now but I think I'm going to withdraw from all of my classes. Lucky me the nausea was so bad I couldn't deal with walking on campus and it started just a week after classes started! It let up right before spring break. Now yesterday I got hurt on the job and I got put any weight on my left leg! Nothing is going right today!!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:30 PM on Mar. 30, 2009

  • I'm guessing we're not getting the whole story there...any idea what made him change his mind?

    Answer by gramsmom at 3:35 PM on Mar. 30, 2009

  • I honestly don't know. He's sort of an odd character to begin with... You'd have to meet him to know what I mean, lol. But... I'm thinking it could be 2 things. One is my fiance is his stepson, yet he has 3 grown men who are all living off of GA or disability and none have jobs.... they're all essentially messes. and he believes they will be upset if we move in (and pay rent which they would never do). The other thing is that he is disappointed that I am pregnant before we have finished our BA degrees and believes we are free-loading. The 3rd is he could just be venting relationship frustrations towards my fiance's mom. All in all, a better idea not to live there if we would just be pawns in his emotional issues... but still.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:38 PM on Mar. 30, 2009

  • You just said a mouthful... better idea not to live there if we would jut be pains in his emotional issues....
    You can make it work, lots of single moms manage school, job and baby all by themselves and lucky for you, you have your man to help you. If nothing else, take some online courses while the baby is small/pregnant so that you can save the money for daycare.

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 3:57 PM on Mar. 30, 2009

  • We were 23 when we had our first child, and we already owned our house.

    This may sound bitchy, but you're probably better off with this not working out, if your fiancé's family is going to behave that way. If they would do this even before you move in, can you imagine how they would have acted as landlords? You guys would have been under their thumbs completely. Personally, I wouldn't deal with family at all when it comes to finances. It just never works out the way you plan, you know? The situation sucks, but like lisa_ann said, you can do it. It's going to be more work, but at least you won't feel like you are in debt to your fiancé's wacky family.

    Answer by JulieJacobKyle at 4:28 PM on Mar. 30, 2009

  • When I had my first I already owned my own home...

    From experience I've never been able to depend on anyone but my husband. So going forward that is what you should do. Don't dwell on the negative...just move forward. That's all you can do.

    Answer by NJMom2Tyler at 5:12 PM on Mar. 30, 2009

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