Have a suitcase or two sitting by the door so he sees it (them) when he walks from work. Tell him that the relationship is off-kilter and you need him to leave so you can have time to think things over by yourself. Force him to leave and give him a hotel key telling him you figured you would do the decent thing by booking him a room.
When he gets to the hotel room he will see it decorated with candles, soft music, jasmine and musk scents, satin sheets, and love note on the bed from you to him that says "April Fools, my Love."
You will have followed behind him in your car and use your key after he has spent a moment in the room and walk in with just a long coat on - and nothing underneath.
Hopefully, he is the sort of man that is forgiving and easily sexually aroused by the smells and the sight of you when you take that long coat off. Ooh la la!!!
at 7:35 PM on Mar. 31, 2009