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I found that my husband is on dating web sites and chats online all the time. I feel gulity for envading his laptop computer. How can I confront him about the online cheating even though I was wrong to go through his laptop.

Yesterday I asked this question and received some good advice. When I got in last night my husband was in our bedroom watching TV. I was pretty quite yesterday after I observed that crap on the laptop. He knew something was up because I gave him the cold shoulder. To make long story short, I took a shower and did my whole night routine and climbed in bed with him. I asked him if we could talk and he said of course. I asked him if he had something to tell me and he did not know how to respond. I asked him was he happy with me? He said yes. I asked him if he was happy with me and all is well "why were you "IM" (instant messaging) and I told him exactly what I read. He did not know what to say or do because I put him on BLAST!!. I cried and I told him that I was hurt and confused. I was honest but he had a loss of words. I woke up this morning he went to work and has been calling/texting/emailing me all day.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:50 PM on Mar. 31, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • I know your main thing is reasons, you dont understand how or why he did this to you. But i mean its a man, and its not likely that he will give you a real reason. I think letting him talk his head off until it drives him nuts is the best idea. maybe he'll spill the truth when the silence drives him crazy
    Kbmancine

    Answer by Kbmancine at 7:01 PM on Mar. 31, 2009

  • He is scared he is going to lose you. Honestly i would keep up the cold shoulder. He needs to know that its not acceptable and wont be easily forgiven or forgetable. and good luck
    Kbmancine

    Answer by Kbmancine at 6:56 PM on Mar. 31, 2009

  • SoleN...
    I 'am still at work and I plan on going to the gym for a couple of hours. I will talk to him when I get home. In his text messages and emails to me he advised me that he no longer has (IM) instant messaging accounts and is not part of any dating sites. He advised me the that dating site was a APP from his I-phone and it was a mistake. I want to believe him but he will have to prove everthing to me. In his last email he said "I do not want to lose the last love of my life" . But I need to know the reason it happened. I believe everything happens for a reason.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:58 PM on Mar. 31, 2009

  • Oh honey ---- comparing those "wrongs" is like comparing a serial killer to a kid that stole a pack of gum! We have women's intuition for a reason!

    Not only would I keep checking his computer (IF, and that's a big "if" I even let him stay in the house), I'd install a keylogger & tap into his phones, go through his car, and anything else I could think of.

    "online cheating" leads to real cheating which leads to hubby giving you something penicillin won't cure.
    Laura1229

    Answer by Laura1229 at 7:00 PM on Mar. 31, 2009

  • and yes! you can get keylogger trials online!!!
    Kbmancine

    Answer by Kbmancine at 7:02 PM on Mar. 31, 2009

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