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my 17 year old son went to school today and threated my husbands life and he is on probation. Everyone tells us there is nothing we can do. why do parents have no rights and the kids have all of them?

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mary211

Asked by mary211 at 3:38 PM on Apr. 1, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

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Answers (13)
  • He threatned your husband? Report it to the police. I understand it is hard because he is your son but he has no right to threaten anybody.
    rememberm3alway

    Answer by rememberm3alway at 3:39 PM on Apr. 1, 2009

  • what do you mean theres nothing you can do. whoever told you that must not have a brain. file a police report.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:39 PM on Apr. 1, 2009

  • Whoever told you there is nothing you can do is wrong. Your son is on probation and threatened your husbands life? Call his PO and have him taken in on a PO hold. Call the police and tell them he threatened your husband.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 5:08 PM on Apr. 1, 2009

  • We did call his PO she said there was nothing that she could do. The police said that they had to witness him tell my husband he would hurt him. We have done all this and no one listens.
    mary211

    Answer by mary211 at 5:35 PM on Apr. 1, 2009

  • I understand your frustration, my step brother is terrible and his probation officer keeps letting him get away with everything! Seeing what my dad and step mom went through with him I agree the kids really do have the rights, they called his PO all the time and were told that until he is 21 if he is still enrolled in school even though he never attended they are responsible for him. They cannot lock him in the house or out of it! They finally kicked him out at 18 because it was bad enough they were willing to take the risk of CPS charging them with neglect.


     I would call probation if he has an easy officer ask if his case can be transferred.

    goaliemom93

    Answer by goaliemom93 at 5:38 PM on Apr. 1, 2009

  • You raised him to be that way. Children become a product of their up bringing. You waited to long to take action and be a parent. And now you have to deal with the outbreak. There is no way in hell any of my children will ever talk to or treat us that way. Rude, irresponsible, and deceitful behavior should not be tolorated on your part. Why has he been allowed to get away with this behavior in the past? Why have you allowed it to continue? You are the parent, YOU are the boss. He lives in your house, he needs to do what you say. Thats the end of it. He tries to leave, baracade the doors. He tries to climb out the window, install a security system. Take away the cell phone, the laptop, the car keys. It is not going to be easy, but parenting is not always easy. Don't let him get away with any of. He threatens you, punish him. Make him do chores, send him to bed at 9. -cont-
    Vanessannd

    Answer by Vanessannd at 7:56 PM on Apr. 1, 2009

  • if he is going to act like a spoiled todler that doesn't get his way, treat him like one. Ground him. Drive him to school and be there waiting to pick him up so he can't go anywhere else. You will have to do alot, and monitor him alot, restrict his activities. Children act this way because parents let them. Parents don't do what they need to do because they say its too hard,m or they have tried everything. Thats a crock of shit. You are the parent. YOU are the boss. YOU ARE HIS MOTHER. Bring him to the state pen, ask to do a tour, some places will even have him sit with convicts so they can tell him what kind of road he is heading down if he doesn't grow up and act right.
    BUT MOST IMPORTANT, DO NOT STOP LOVING HIM. Remind him that you are his parents and that you love him. That you want the best for himm and that he is better then the actions he is choosing to take.
    Vanessannd

    Answer by Vanessannd at 8:00 PM on Apr. 1, 2009

  • I think your son should be reported to the poilce. If that doesnt work then tell him we are going to ground you and tell him i or we are going to pick you up after school and we are going to take you were ever you need to go. If he doesnt like it he can get out of the house. That is showing your son tough love and i am perrty sure you and his dad love him. remind your son to think about what he is doing or what he is saying before he does or says something to hurt anyone. Tell him we want whats best for you and we know whats best for you thats why god gave you parents for you to love us and listen to us and so we can guide you.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:46 AM on Apr. 2, 2009

  • First of all he was not raised that way, I have 6 children and he is the only one that acts that way. and for your information we have had him in hospitals 4 times and he has been on medication and in jail since he was 12, I have done everything for this boy and I love him very much. He needs to pay for his actions and don't say that your children will never do that, it doesnt matter how well you bring them up this can happen to anyone.
    mary211

    Answer by mary211 at 10:13 AM on Apr. 2, 2009

  • Sometimes troubled souls happen to good parents no matter what you do for them. It makes me sad as a mother to think of these things. I think at this point you need to let the law take care of him. I would tell him you love him and are there for him but that he is not allowed to mistreat you. He will need to find other living arangements. Have you thought of a camp/school for troubled teens. Sometimes a good scare is all it takes. Has he toured a federal prison and been told this is where he will end up if he doesn't cut the crap? Have you tried counseling?
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 11:19 AM on Apr. 2, 2009

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