Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How can u leave your little baby all day???

I was so fortunate when we had our first son. I was able to stay home with him. Now with my second I have to go back to work to keep our family afloat. My husband is a police officer and he had to take a big pay cut plus won't be allowed to work any over time. We have already cut back our expenses as much as possible but still are overdrawn. The only option we have left is for me to take a job. Our second is almost 3 months old and I can't imagine leaving him everyday!! I cry and cry about it whenever I think of leaving him and our 3 year old. How do other women handle this? How will I be able to exclusively breastfeed him if I am gone so much? I am so upset about this.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:00 PM on Apr. 1, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

Answers (14)
  • You'll get over it trust me. Jeez. Yeah some women cry, but you do what you have to do. He will be just fine and after a while won't even know you are gone.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:03 PM on Apr. 1, 2009

  • You pump and store it. I did it for 6 months. And you get over it. You're HELPING your family, not hurting them. I guess you guys could move to a cheaper place to live if you have to, like an apartment.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:04 PM on Apr. 1, 2009

  • I am sorry but the advice that "he will get over it" or I will doesn't help at all! I am his mom! I want him to love and need me!! He is only 3 months old!! He will only be a baby for a short time. Every day spent without him is time I will NEVER get back.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:13 PM on Apr. 1, 2009

  • I know exactly how you feel....damn what a bunch of heartless people....anyway, I didn't go back til my |DD was 5 months and let me tell you, then night before was a sobfest....I couldn't even put her down. I also EBF...I got a pump and take it to work with me(which actually makes you feel closer to her) and my DH would always send me pics over the phone and let me talk to her over the phone. The only way I was able to do it was working on his days off. I only work on an as needed basis so only one or two days every couple of weeks just to help out a bit but I couldn't go back full time. Is there any way you could work when you're DH is home?? Thats what we do....If not just look at is as he will still remember you when you see him and you are only doing what is best for him...after the first couple of days, it really does get better....good luck:)
    calliesmommie

    Answer by calliesmommie at 11:20 PM on Apr. 1, 2009

  • I had the same worries before i started school again after a long break. i was able to stay home for my first daughters infancy, however with times getting tough, i decided it was time for me to go back to school to make something of myself instead of remaining stagnant in life and falling deeper into debt. my oldest just turned 3 when i started school and my youngest was 10 months old who was/still is breastfeeding. its tough and heartbreaking cause every time they drop me off to school, she starts crying her eyes out when i give her and her sister their kiss good bye. she knows the routine and knows i'm gonna be gone for a few hours. it still sad for me. but you just have to toughen up and know that what your doing is for the greater good of the family. i tried scheduling the least amount of time at school as possible to have more time at home with them. your contribution/sacrifice will help more than it hurts.good luck
    rAbella

    Answer by rAbella at 11:52 PM on Apr. 1, 2009

  • He will ALWAYS love and need you unless you beat him. No worries on that score, OK?

    Take it froma full time working mom...they are STILLL attached to you. You know the saying, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder?" It's a cliche because it's the truth.

    You're dong what you have to do. Remember that. He will NOT appreciate living on the street so you can be home with him (taking things to their worst possible conclusion).

    Breastfeeding? Easy peasy. **grin** Well, pumpingis a pain in the butt. But the MOST successful breastfeeders I've known were working full time outside the home. I'll count myself in that number...nursed when home, pumped at work for the first year and then continues to nurse to 26 months. It CAN be done. it's a HUGE myth that you cannot work and breastfeed. One of the biggest lies on the planet.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 11:55 PM on Apr. 1, 2009

  • This section is so cruddy for long answers.

    Another rule for you: Firsts don't happen if the parents aren't there to see it. I don't care if baby has been "talking" to the sitter for a month...the first words are the ones you and dad hear.

    Remember that you're doing what must be done. OK?
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 11:57 PM on Apr. 1, 2009

  • What about working from home? I'm looking into that right now. I'm a single mom.
    lovepink26

    Answer by lovepink26 at 12:08 AM on Apr. 2, 2009

  • Honestly we didn't have a choice.. I'm make twice as much as my husband. And leaving at first is hard... but you get used to it. And sometimes it's even nice to get sometime to yourself and just be around adults. Other times you miss you baby like crazy!
    My son is breastfed too... and he takes expressed milk when I am gone (which if you baby hasn't taken bottles yet you might want to start if you have to go back to work.. the longer you wait the more unwilling they seem to be) I just pump at work and he eats what I pump the next day.
    If you are able, check out watching some other peoples kids... 1-2 kids everyday could make $200-400 week! The lady that watches my son is a stay at home mom and has a daughter about my son's age so they play together.
    AmiJanell

    Answer by AmiJanell at 1:18 AM on Apr. 2, 2009

  • i hate leaving my dd every day for work and school but i do it cuz i have no choice and you have to do what you have to do
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:28 AM on Apr. 2, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN