An "open" adoption can be as open as you want it to be. You can always start small, sending her pictures and a letter once in awhile, and work your way up as you see fit...if you see fit. But, if you start with a wide open adoption and the situation becomes unhealthy for anyone involved, it is very difficult to go backwards and cut established ties. No matter what, of course your priority is doing what is best for the child involved. In our situation, we actually have contact with the birth grandparents and not the birth mother...she, too, is unstable and we were not comfortable with her being in our daughter's life. The grandparents, however, are WONDERFUL people and we are blessed to have them in our daughter's life. God bless you and best of luck with your difficult decision.
at 1:21 PM on Jun. 21, 2008