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Do you think its fair for the wife or SO do do absolutly everything to do with the kids while DH or SO just works and comes home and does absolutly nothing else?

I cant stand my SO right now.... just lays in front of the TV while I have to bug him to change a diaper or make a bottle while DD is screaming


Asked by Anonymous at 8:41 PM on Apr. 3, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (20)
  • Marriage is a partnership. I worked for 6 years of our marriage and I was still expected to come home and cook, clean etc. Once I became a full-time I felt more challenged. He is out all day but he gets to clock out while your job as a homemaker is 24 hrs/7 days a week. You need to speak to him and tell him how you feel b4 you lose it!

    Answer by living4mykids at 8:52 PM on Apr. 3, 2009

  • I know what you mean my hubby does the same thing

    Answer by mommy5409 at 8:43 PM on Apr. 3, 2009

  • Well, if the mom's not working then it should be her main duty, but the dude should definitely help out once in awhile. But if he's working full time to put food in your bellies and a roof over your head then you'd understand! Or get a job yourself!

    Answer by prettyrayray at 8:44 PM on Apr. 3, 2009

  • Oh hell no. My hubby works, but he comes home and helps alot too. I stay at home and dont expect him to do alot of the chores, like dishes or laundry type things, but we have 3 kids and he wanted a big family too, so yeah he comes home and keeps them occupied while have 10 minutes to myself, he will make dinner about 1-2 times a week, we take turns on the weekends sleeping in, I do one day he does the next. But I have worked before too, and he knows what it is like to be a stay at home parent, that didnt last long, let me tell ya. You need to have a sit down with your huby, maybe he really doesnt understand what it is like in your shoes, alot of men don't.

    Answer by AK_aries at 8:45 PM on Apr. 3, 2009

  • No, I believe that your partnership with another person should be just that, a partnership. My husband and myself share chores. Yes, I do most of the housework because he works most of the day, but when he comes home he will take out the garbage and do other little things before he relaxes. If I need help with anything he jumps right to it, and its the same with me. We share all responsibilities and we both believe thats how it should be. Good luck.

    Answer by twocutetwins09 at 8:45 PM on Apr. 3, 2009

  • It depends on what is meant by "fair." If both people share the tasks, then he is entitled to some time off, just as you are. If he has a backbreaking 12 hour a day job, then he should be able to come home and relax. At least for a while. He should then get up and lend a hand. After all you have a 24 hour a day job.

    Answer by Bmat at 8:46 PM on Apr. 3, 2009

  • Actually my mother puts a roof over his head and all he pays for is my DD's food and his own car payment if you want to get technical.... If I need anything, which is very rare except tampons and maybe a 10 dollar pair of jeans i usually ask my father.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:46 PM on Apr. 3, 2009

  • I know what you mean. My husband works 60 hour work weeks, only gets one day off from work and when he is home he doesn't do much of anything around the house, let alone with the kids. It's not fair. But you know what? I keep reminding myself that life is not fair. And I am thankful that my husband does have a job and is able to provide for our family so that I do not have to work and put my kids in child care. Every time that I find myself starting to nag him to do something, I quietly remind myself of all the sacrifices that he makes for me and our children.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:47 PM on Apr. 3, 2009

  • Okay OP here again..... Well he works away from home 5 days a week, so he goes back to a hotel and can watch TV all night long and not lift a finger while I am at home with DD all week long tending to her every need by myself. When he comes home on the weekend he doesnt want to do jack shit. He doesnt have to bathe her, he doesnt have to change diapers on a daily basis , he doesnt have to wake up at night....

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:48 PM on Apr. 3, 2009

  • Put your foot down, especially if he is not the one supporting you, you deserve better.

    Answer by AK_aries at 8:51 PM on Apr. 3, 2009