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Is 7 days too long?

To make my 10 yr. old son go without T.V., computer,skateboard and playing with neighborhood friends for throwing 2 lemons at our neighbors house? He didn't break anything or aim at anything, but I was appalled by his behavior! He was spanked 3 times by me and wrote a letter of apology for disrespecting thier home. We are on day 3 and I am running out of things for him to do. He finished the Spiderwick Chronicles. Should I shorten the punishment?

 
Gigi1969

Asked by Gigi1969 at 2:21 AM on Apr. 4, 2009 in Just for Fun

Level 3 (22 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • I remember when I was about your son's age, my parents would send me to my room for an hour while they discussed punishment. I later found out that they only took about ten minutes to come to a conclusion, but they liked letting me worry. I would come up with these terrible potential punishments. Like a month grounding. I would only be able to go from school back home and back to school again. They would take away my stereo and my tv and make me stay in my room the entire time. None of these things happened of course, but no matter. Everytime I got in trouble, I would still think of terrible punishments. I think that was worse, the worry, then the actual punishment. So Gdiamante has a great point there. He gets to worry about it and has some time to think about his actions, and you have some time to cool off and punish based on the offense, not off your emotions at the time.
    Mom1Stepmom1

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 3:22 AM on Apr. 4, 2009

  • Angry much? Sounds like you should be punishing yourself!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:26 AM on Apr. 4, 2009

  • OK, I just asked this because:
    1. I really was curious if I am being too hard on him.
    2. I wanted to post a new question.
    Gigi1969

    Answer by Gigi1969 at 2:36 AM on Apr. 4, 2009

  • If you've set his punishment at 7 days what message does it send to shorten it because you've run out of things for him to do. My kids routinely find themselves grounded from their videogames and the computer (except for homework). If they are grounded for a week, they get a week. Now they can earn it back sooner by doing extra chores around the house. My 10yo took a day off his grounding by shoveling our sidewalks, front and back, our driveway and in front of the neighbors. Another day for cleaning the bathroom including washing the walls and another by vaccuming the stairs and hallway upstairs. He came up with these jobs on his own and did them on his own intiative, no prompting. It does seem like a harsh punishment for a minor incident, I personally would have grounded from one or two, but not all. But like you said it's about the disrespect and needed to be nipped in the bud. Maybe have a chat about why he was...
    canadianmom1974

    Answer by canadianmom1974 at 2:37 AM on Apr. 4, 2009

  • 7 days is not too long....Hang in there. You have to follow through. I was going through the same thing with my 4 year old. Punished her with no T.V. for a day and she was driving me up the wall. it was more like I was punishing myself.
    actress

    Answer by actress at 2:37 AM on Apr. 4, 2009

  • punished and if he shows that he understands why it was wrong (and not just because he got grounded) then maybe shorten the grounding.
    canadianmom1974

    Answer by canadianmom1974 at 2:38 AM on Apr. 4, 2009

  • Ok first of all dont liston to who ever wrote the first answer.
    Anywho I think that it depends on him. Does he understand what he did wrong? if so then i dont think shortining the punishment will be a bad thing. since the point of punishment is so they understand it was not a good choice and bad choices have bad outcomes.
    Also I understand why it up set you. just try to talk to him and see how he feels about what he did now..
    DarcieJ

    Answer by DarcieJ at 2:40 AM on Apr. 4, 2009

  • I think you are right. He is 10! He knows the difference between right & wrong. Talk to his teacher about extra credit work, find out about seniors who need yard work done, He will "hate you" right now but when he's an adult he will thank you. You are shaping the man he will be tomorrow
    WAganma56

    Answer by WAganma56 at 2:41 AM on Apr. 4, 2009

  • He knows better. In my husband's opinion, you were too soft on him actually. I think you should stick to your guns. He can read, so take him to the library to check out some books. He can do chores, or he can help other people around the neighborhood. I think if you cut him short, it will send a poor message unless you do it because he really seems to understand the reasoning as to why you reacted the way you did.
    Mom1Stepmom1

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 2:45 AM on Apr. 4, 2009

  • Damn! Good thing I asked this because I was just about to fold and say ok. But I do like the idea of working off days from the 7. He did mow the front lawn today. OK but I do have to ask this part before Judge Gigi makes a decision.... ONE WEEK came out of my mouth like nothing and from no where! I have given kids at school detention for one day for doing worst things, so was my punishment given to him more out of being embarrassed? hmmmm something to ponder.
    Gigi1969

    Answer by Gigi1969 at 2:46 AM on Apr. 4, 2009