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Touch of baby blues or normal parenting thoughts?

I had a baby 3 weeks ago and also have another DS that is almost 3.
Today is a gorgeous day out, the first one of the year. I'm so yearning to pack up the dog and go for a hike. But I can't.
I'm stuck at home doing housework and I might be able to take the kids to the park later.
Since I had ODS, I've never felt the desire to go off and do what I wanted. I've never minded doing everything for him and my new DS.
It would be so nice to just go for a hike, stop at a nice shady tree and read, then call up the girls and go to a local wine bar and have good wine, yummy cheese and great chocolate.
I understand that this is just part of being a parent, but I would love to just have a selfish and self-serving day.
Is this a case of baby blues or just normal parenting thoughts and feelings?
I feel so bad for just wanting to have a day to myself!!!

 
nwdeserangel

Asked by nwdeserangel at 2:11 PM on Apr. 4, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 6 (111 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • You are allowed to have a you day. You became a mom, and to be the best mom you can be, you need you time. Don't forget you need to take care of yourself, so that you can better take care of your children and family. I say leave the kids with daddy, or the grandparents and spend the day at the spa, park, out with the girls.
    I don't know how I would cope if I didn't get my alone time. I go to the gym during the week which provieds daycare. And once a month Hubby and I have a whole day to ourselves. And we i need a break, I leave the kids with hubby and go for a drive down to sonic for a moca java chiller and just relax while i drink it :-)
    Vanessannd

    Answer by Vanessannd at 11:22 PM on Apr. 4, 2009

  • I don't know which it is LOL But I can tell you that I yearn for my pre-baby life on occasion and would love to just be able to jump up and do something alone. Or just last minute decide to go to a nice dinner or go bowling without the "chase". Or even just read A book on my couch like I used to. So I am with ya on that:)
    heather.darin

    Answer by heather.darin at 2:15 PM on Apr. 4, 2009

  • Definitely normal. We all feel bad to want time to ourselves, but we need that time to be happy ourselves too. I hardly ever have anyone watch my DD. But tonight my boyfriend is going to a gun show, and my mom called and asked if she could watch my DD tonight. I took her up on the offer, my DD is almost 3 and I've hardly had any time just to myself since she has been here. So the reality of having the night to myself, got me a little excited. I think I'm going to take a nice long bath, then curl up and read a book with a glass of wine...It sounds so nice, I cannot wait. So I don't think it is the baby blues at all. Good Luck. :)
    pamelajqs

    Answer by pamelajqs at 2:17 PM on Apr. 4, 2009

  • Your missing your past life..Before the kids..It happens to all of us now and then.. Take the kids to the park.Get some of that sun..It might make you feel better.. You will have that break,,when your youngest is in school finally. I wish I was able to give you a break .Maybe in another life..Right

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 2:22 PM on Apr. 4, 2009

  • I totally agree that it is not the baby blues. I think that this is normal and we all want those baby free days once in a while. I want one now. But work requires my attention as my DD does. See if maybe someone can take your LO's for a while so you can have a selfish self serving day.
    coala

    Answer by coala at 2:30 PM on Apr. 4, 2009

  • It's all normal, it takes a little time to adjust, the weight isn't forever to be selfish when you deserve it. Think of how well and worth it is and how it will be in the long run. Time is of the essence. They don't call us mom for nothing, we are strong and patient. You'll do fine. I only have a 2 1/2 year old he's very time consuming, but my newborn son will be here in 2 1/2 months so.... my wait will be worth it, I will have to wonderful kids for me to cherish and to help them develop into something wonderful. I think it's worth the wait. Besides you can always have play/mommy dates. Have all the kids get together and let them play while the mommy's have a nice brunch, lunch or dinner. With some wine, cheese and or chocolate.
    BabygrlBard

    Answer by BabygrlBard at 3:50 PM on Apr. 4, 2009

  • that sounds like such a wonderful day. i so feel you on wanting a day to myself sometimes.
    Michelle451

    Answer by Michelle451 at 6:11 PM on Apr. 4, 2009

  • Michelle, after you pop out those girls and you're feeling better, we'll leave the kids with the guys and go do it, lol!!!
    nwdeserangel

    Answer by nwdeserangel at 6:36 PM on Apr. 4, 2009

  • I can be honest and say I yearn for those days too - I watch my husband have them and he quite often offers them to me but as mothers I think we take guilt with us anyway IF we would ever decide to even go - I call this mommy guilt - i have felt resentful that I dont get to do "my" things anymore but it passes - but I do now ask for HELP - but I am very lcuky with my husband also.
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 11:34 PM on Apr. 4, 2009

  • It's totally normal! Try to arrange a few hours to yourself sometime soon! In the meantime, screw the housework! It will still be there when you get back but the beautiful weather won't last forever! Throw the baby in a sling and take the kids to a trail in the park. You will all feel better getting out of the house.
    TanyaR1024

    Answer by TanyaR1024 at 11:56 PM on Apr. 4, 2009