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ami guilty or right

okay so in this economy and since this is my first i told my husband i wanted to be a stay at home mom until our son is in school just so i cant have the time with him we can not afford daycare in our area even if i was working. however my mil says she can take the kid to her daycare one little problem with that is that she only works there for 4 hours and hen goes home her house is disgusting i refuse to go in there and everyone eles just avoids going at all. why would i want my son in there with all those nasty animals that piss and shed everywhere what is she gonna do hold him the whole time
am i right or wrong for wanting to be a stay at home mom for 5 years because of all this? i mean its nice and all that she volonteered to do it but i dont think it well be in my sons best intrest i think him being with me is much better ofan idea but i kinda feel qiulty should i?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 3:40 PM on Apr. 5, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (6)
  • If you can afford to stay home then I think you should, if you need your income I would have you MIL watch your baby at your house. At least you won't have to worry about him crawling in filth.

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 3:50 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • Any chance she might be willing to bring him to your house when she's done?

    It's hard to argue the financial benefit of you staying at home when you're being offered free child care. However, the emotional benefit of it is something that cannot be measured. But emotions don't pay the bills. It's a hard place to be in.

    If you can afford it, stay home. Regardless of your MIL's offer. If it's going to make things too tough financially, take the help where you can get it. Find something that fits in that 4 hour window if you can.

    Answer by AutmnDreams at 3:51 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • The only people that should have any say in your choice is you and your husband. Leave MIL out and thank her for her offer. If you can afford it, try it. It's not permanent. If it doesn't work out, then go back to work.

    Answer by ReneeK3 at 4:31 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • the bottom line is can you afford it and is your husband at NO risk of geting laid off if that is the case then I don't see why not, I know it is a hard choice to make. I had to make it when the economy didn't suck and it was still really hard I chose to work for a year but I took 6months off befor returning worked for a year built up our savings and paid off all of my personal debt I feel better having done it this way. and about your mother in law why don't you have her watch your son at your house?

    Answer by lalasha at 8:17 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • Why can't you get a job around you husband's job. My DH is a teacher so he HAS to work certain hours. I don't believe in daycare and hoestly am a bit of a freak about who DD is with so I work evenings after he gets home. It's the best of both worlds.

    Answer by jillmw at 2:26 PM on Apr. 6, 2009

  • Maybe you could work at a daycare. Its some income, not a lot, but at least you get to be with your kid. Or like others said. Have him watch her at your house, or work nights if hubby works day.

    I personally belive that moms should go to leanghts to stay at home with their kids. If you have to cut out cable, eating out or other extras it might be worth it to stay at home with your baby. The baby only gets one "First Step" and only once says "Mama". don't wanna miss that.

    Answer by lstrickland at 3:42 PM on Apr. 6, 2009

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