Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Okay, so all this talk about who is responsible when a child does something really bad, or where to we step in even if it's not our kid, and those kind of things.....

Brings me to remember something. A friend of ours has a brother who has a child who is obviously a special needs child. The father does nothing...he hasn't been diagnosed, no special programs, counseling, training, awareness nothing. His excuse is he can't afford it. The state pays for kids who are disabled to get help. I feel there is no excuse!! He is seven years old and shows some signs of possibly autism, and severe behavioral problems. I observed this child smashing grasshoppers with a brick for twenty minutes, then got boored with that and started ripping their heads off with his fingers for another half hour. Dad did nothing. This kid killed two kittens from rough play, and hurt my friends little dog. He has no supervision and my friend doesn't want this kid in her house, I won't even let him around my kids, especially my two month old. I'm sure part of it is none of my beeswax, but it's really disturbing...

Answer Question

Asked by Steff107 at 6:18 PM on Apr. 5, 2009 in Just for Fun

Level 3 (16 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • He actually scares me. I wonder if the right type of intervention could help him. He's still just a little kid. I feel like he could have a really bad life just because everyone brushed it under the carpet and it was no one s business. What if he grew up and hurt someone else?

    Answer by Steff107 at 6:19 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • Not getting needed evaluations and treatments is a form of neglect. The school should be doing something about this child.

    Answer by goaliemom93 at 6:34 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • I think what you should do is give DFS a call. Just let them know that your not reporting anything bad, but that your just conserned for his and other children involved. Plus you don't even have to give them your name if you don't want just make it anon if your afraid it might get back to them that your the one who called.

    Answer by lovemybaby283 at 6:36 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • Call CPS on his ass.

    Answer by louise2 at 6:38 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • I'd call CPS too but I was wonder why you sat so long watching him do this. That scares me too.


    Answer by Anonymous at 6:56 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • The child needs help from what you have explained. Denial is not only a river in Egypt

    Answer by ronjwake at 6:58 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • Whatever anon, I've only met the kid twice for a total of two hours. It's not exactly like me to just jump right in and call cps on someone I just met. The rest I've heard from my friend. Don't be so freaking judgmental. My doubts are very high that you would jump in in a hot second. I don't care what you say.

    Answer by Steff107 at 7:04 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • it's normal to have concerns and want to speak up or step in, because the father seems to not care, the only thing you can do is keep away!so sad this child will grow up with out the help he needs, i understand that money is an issue, however there is help out there he'snot looking or searching hard enough, and if this kid is already hurting/killing animals he's already in trouble, so pray this kid gets help before it's way to late

    Answer by mememommie at 7:19 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • Yikes! I don't know if Autism is the first thing that comes to mind for me, but you're right that something is "atypical" or "maladaptive." (Those are my work words!) As the person who chairs meetings in schools to qualify students for SpEd, a parent will demand meetings for anything, AND get it. Federal law (though states can interpret it a little differently) allows a parent to seek evaluations based on a suspected disability. Our testing is FREE! If he's tested AND there are incident/behavioral reports from staff, he'll qualify for something. (IF the behavior is only at home, the school may not act.) If the parent doesn't agree with the school's testing AND they qualify, they are entitled to PRIVATE evaluations that the school system will pay for... And if you're talking mental illness, serious developmental delays or emotional disturbance, the hospitals/doctors can make the diagnosis. (Schools usually cannot.)

    Answer by jonosmama at 7:58 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • Cont'd... If you've witnessed disturbing behavior, you can phone DCF anonymously. They may not pursue or investigate, but you've at least done your part as a good citizen and member of his "village." Unfortunately, I see this way too often: parents are in denial. They don't want to see it until it's too late. And that's not until someone's been seriously hurt or worse. Good luck!

    Answer by jonosmama at 8:01 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.