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Kissing kids?? What NOW?

My in laws daughter is seven, and I caught her and my nine yr old daughter under a blanket straddling and kissing. This isn't the first time this happened. The last time my husbands grandmother was watching them. But it was my four yr old son with the seven yr old under a blanket kissing. Of course with grannies old ways the boy got the blame. I didn't think it was something to go over board with and he said they were playing princess. I just told him never to do it again. That was almost a yr ago. And now this happened. My daughter is trying to deny the whole thing even tho I caught them. What should I do & what should I tell my daughter. Obviously they wont be left alone again while I have them but what else?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:32 PM on Apr. 5, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (10)
  • I would try to explain to your 9 year old that what she was doing is inappropriate for her age, and it may be time to have a serious sex conversation with her. She may be young, but she is acting out in a very concerning manner.
    dragonfly7271

    Answer by dragonfly7271 at 7:37 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • Ask her questions..About if she really knows what she is doing. Has she seen you and your DH doing things she shouldn't have seen? Or on TV maybe.There are always reasons why kids do things.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 7:40 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • well the way you put it, it sounds like it's your in laws daughter starting it, especially if your kids haven't acted like this except around her. i would just tell your kids that it's not right for them to do this at that age, and that only married people do that. you might want to look into what the other child is watching, either something on tv or her parents? she could be learning from that...GL sorry i couldn't help much
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:43 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • you know (this post is SO going to be anon!!) I did this with a friend when I was around that age (a little older actually) and although I honestly don't remember the details, like how it started or WHY, I do know that it was totally innocent and something that happened a few times and then just stopped naturally...I really wouldn't be too hard on her. She may not really understand WHY she did it so don't bug her for a reason... I don't know, I just don't think you need to worry or make a big deal out of it. I'm sure it was an upsetting thing to see! Maybe just getting caught was humiliating to the point that she won't want to do it again..I would just keep an eye on her.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:55 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • umm did you tell the 9y/o parents that that is a huge sign their child has been sexually abused or might have seen something she shouldn't have ie graffic movie or even porn. It's not your job to sit her down but if you don't think her parents are going to take you seriously then I would sit her down and try to find out where she learned/saw this and explain to her why she shouldn't be acting that way.
    lalasha

    Answer by lalasha at 8:22 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • This is a normal thing for that age I am pretty sure. Kids are curious. I agree with anon. I wouldn't stress her out with questioning or anything. I am sure the embarassment will make her think twice about doing it again.
    LovinMyMikayla

    Answer by LovinMyMikayla at 8:24 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • um i think if they are doing those things that some thing wrong is going on in that house.
    mrssundin

    Answer by mrssundin at 9:23 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • The only thing you can do is sit them down and talk to them about it, embarrassing them also is a great deterrent. I know it sounds mean but I was over at my friend's house and we caught her son (9) and my daughter (8) cuddling on the bed kissing. We were so shocked we didn't know whether to laugh or yell. We separated them and sat them down and explained how they were too young to be kissing anyone, every once in a while we will bring it up and they get so embarrassed that I don't think they will be kissing anyone again for quite a while.

    sammiesmom2000

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 9:45 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • it's completely normal for kids to experiment and be curious like that. if it was anything more than kissing i could see being upset...maybe it is time for the sex talk, but i wouldn't jump that far yet.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:37 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • My cousins daughter tried to pull another female relative into her closet to show her her "private area". She was around 6 or 7. I dont know where the children get this from. A girl I sit for is 5 and her mother recently caught her touching herself and pretending to "make-out" with a barbie.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:02 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

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