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Would you leave this man?

You have a child w/ him & he is a good daddy, but doesn't take care of the child financially b/c he doesn't have a steady job.

Doesn't have a place to live, but goes back & forth between two homes.

Bums money off you all the time.

You have chemistry & a decent sex life, but you have no idea why you're with him mentally/emotionally.

Likes to drink & party.

Hates his current life/situation & wants better, but doesn't actively do anything to change it.

Gets sick a lot, coughs up weird mucus, & has sickly stool.

Doesn't want to quit smoking.

Is almost 30 & has nothing to show for himself.

Has a criminal background.

He calls you his best friend & loves you a lot, but sometimes doesn't show it the way he should.

You don't want to leave him b/c you'd then be alone.

You love him, but you don't know why.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:32 PM on Apr. 5, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (48)
  • Yes and quickly!! The sickly stool did it for me :(

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:35 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • Honestly, if i loved him then no. I was in the same boat minus the age. It took time but four years later, we are here, living together, he is supporting ME and our son, and we have another on the way. People change. Just gotta have faith, love, courage and trust. End. =]
    p.s. message me to talk further or any advice you may want/need =]

    Answer by mommykayti at 10:36 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • I'd work on my self esteem to realize that I don't have to have a boyfriend to define me. Then I'd leave.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:37 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • I wouldn't want to be with a man-ooops! Sorry, I mean a boy like that. Sounds to me he hasn't grown up yet. If you think you can help change him, I say go for it! If you don't see any kind of results in 2 months, kick his butt to the curb! Two months is PLENTY of time to get started on a new life. It doesn't have to be completely done; just started.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:38 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • drinking, partying, smoking, no financial support---that's not a good daddy. IMO

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:41 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • Anon 9:41...he is a good daddy to his son. He cares for him, feeds him, bathes him, is there for him, etc. His habits make him a bad person...not a bad dad. At first I thought him being there emotionally for his son was enough, but he needs to pay for diapers. For clothes. For his daycare. Money becomes very important when you have a child. His parents/family buy him clothes and things like that. But that's his family...not him. I wish HE would do something! My mother and I pay for everything. I take care of my son. I take care of my boyfriend. I take care of myself. I wish he would take care of me for a change!

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:50 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • I think every person "grows up" differently. My SO was like that until about 2 years ago. The first five years I worked or we depended on help from family. He finally realized what he had and that he did not want to lose us. If youlove him stick with him and try to help him better himself.

    Answer by mommabear1226 at 10:51 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • Not being in the situation, I can't say for sure, but I think I would probably tell him to get his stuff straight in a certain amount of time, or I'd be gone & taking the child with me. Hugs to you, I hope it works out for you & your little one!

    Answer by fosternpa at 10:54 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • Well, I guess most of you ladies would think I should leave my hubby then. He hasn't had a job for the last two years. He takes care of the kids. I am a SHAM for now, so yeah, money is tight. But I love him and he loves me, and we both love our children. My hubby also has health issues that we are working on getting him on disability. Just b/c someone doesn't have a job doesn't make them a worthless person. Jobs aren't that easy to find in the first place. And if he is sick, it may be even harder.

    Answer by spiritguide_23 at 10:59 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

  • girl, i would have been gone forever ago...

    sorry but drinking and partying, with no job and not wanting to better yourself is NOT a good daddy

    Answer by JuLiAnSmOmMy317 at 11:02 PM on Apr. 5, 2009

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